Fast paws and sharp claws
can slice you in a second
the cat said, purring
Yallerfloof
Yallerfloof(floofinition) – 1. Foof slang for yellow animal.
In use: “Many people call Papi a ginger cat but Michael always thought of him as a yallerfloof.”
2. Archaic expression for an animal who likes talking or singing about everything.
In use: “The little puppy began life under hard conditions, becoming a yallerfloof early on, a state he never left as he was adopted and found a home, singing about birds and animals in ‘his’ yard, happily barking when his people appeared, and joyfully yipping when he was about to be fed.”
Floofalogue
Floofalogue (floofinition) – 1. A conversation between one or more people with one or more animals.
In use: “The question about who is hungry always began a floofalogue with the cat, but the dogs — a little more reticent, in her opinion, more polite, really — always did join in.”
2. An enumeration of items arranged by an animal.
In use: “The cat had developed a habit of stealing from neighbors and lining up his treasures as a sort of floofalogue of his exploits.”
Xerifloof
Xerifloof (floofinition) – Pet who requires or desires attention.
In use: “Miss Izzy (Isabella Grace) was an underfloof and a xerifloof, coming out to play and eat, but otherwise satisfied with being alone to wash and eat.”
Wayfloof
Wayfloof (floofinition) – Animal who is difficult to control or predict because of unusual or unexpected behavior.
In use: “The little wayfloof, a friendly blend of several breeds, seemed to delight in waiting until she turned her back before bolting down the hall and out the door, or rushing over to steal food somewhere.”
Underfloof
Underfloof – (floofinition) 1. Animal who lives below houses and other structures.
In use: “Many homeowners have discovered that underfloof often include raccoons and skunks seeking places to shelter and raise their babies.”
2. Pet who is reliably beneath their people’s chair when they’re sitting, below the blankets when the people go to sleep, or beneath their feet when they’re walking around.
In use: “Underfloofs like Boo, the bedroom panther, are often tripping hazards as they silently hurry foot to foot as Keri walked, forcing her to veer left and right for fear of kicking the feline or stepping on him.”
Silent Floof
Silent floof
at my feet
waiting to see
if he’ll get a treat
if not that
maybe a scratch on the head
if not that
he’ll just go back to bed
Theocfloofcy
Theocfloofcy (floofinition) – Households in which animals are treated as divine rulers.
In use: “Many people are unwilling to admit it, but once they accept an animal into their household, they begin living under a virtual theocfloofcy, where the pets’ and their desires gain preferential status.”
Socflooftes
Socflooftes (floofinition) – 1. Wise animal said to have lived before animals came to Earth, said to be one of the original architects of the Floof Exchange which allowed animals to come to Earth.
In use: “Flooftologists argue what species of animal Socflooftes was, and what sex. For convenience, Socflooftes is often referred to as a male but no evidence exists to support that he was identified as either sex. As for what manner of creature, a dragon, unicorn, or griffin is often mentioned. As there is anecdotal history to support each of those, one theory holds that Socflooftes was a shapefloofer, able to assume the shape of any creature. Some say that Socflooftes remains alive and sometimes visits Earth.”
2. Any smart or clever animal.
In use: “The bird demonstrated that she was a soclooftes as a video caught her opening her cage, feeding the cat and dog treats, then returning to her cage and locking herself back in.”
Revoflooftionary
Revoflooftionary (floofinition) – 1. Involving an animal’s behavior or presence that causes a complete or dramatic change.
In use: “The cat’s ability to open the door and let herself and the dog out required revofloofionary adjustments to closing and locking the house doors.”
2. Dramatic changes in how animals are viewed or treated.
In use: “The rise of the Internet and ability to share information has accelerated a revoflooftionary changes about testing drugs and cosmetics on animals.”
Michael Seidel, writer 