We live in a divisive area. Few agree on anything. Just today, my house told me it was 105 degrees F, the car said it was 102, and Alexa said it was 100.
Time was sneaking toward six in the morning. He was lazing in bed, floating in the space between dreams and being awake, a cat beside him singing a purr. Open windows poured cool morning air over him, a solid reversal from the hundred degrees experienced hours earlier. Just as it seemed sleeping was seizing an edge, a loud grunt – snarl – snuffle sound sent him full awake. He and the cat sat up in panic-orchestrated synchronization, turning as one to look up at the window. After listening a moment more, he raised himself up and looked out the window.
A bear on the other side of the six-foot privacy fence a dozen feet away returned his gaze. As he mumbled, “Holy shit,” to himself, the bear, apparently bored, dropped out of view. Maybe out of sight, but definitely not out of mind.
He suggested that they take their books to the park and read under some trees.
“Too muggy out,” she answered.
“Muggy? It’s hot and dry.”
“It was muggy to me.”
He looked out the window. No clouds could be seen from east to west, north to south. “Alexa, what’s the current humidity?”
Fifteen percent, the machine answered.
One of them didn’t understand what muggy means, he thought.
A friend announced he was thinking of his age as the temperature and decided he would convert it from Fahrenheit to Celsius, which would make it him just 22 years old.
He picked through the shirts hanging in his closet, looking for one which suited the weather and his plans, and finally selected one. Didn’t look great on him, and not real happy about the pattern, either. He didn’t even understand why he bought it. Oh, well.
He went into the other room. His wife walked by and touched his shoulder. “That shirt always looks so good on you.”
Ah. Puzzle solved.
He checked ‘The Decider’ website to see what they recommended to watch on Prime. The Decider’s first recommendation was for a show on Hulu. Their second recommendation was for the old movie, Top Gun.
He decided The Decider was a waste of time.
At 11:45 PM, the cats demand they be let out of the house. The light is turned on and the landscape is scanned for threats. Deer are okay but they’re not out there. No bears, cougars, other cats, foxes, raccoons, or skunks are seen, but a lone opossum wanders along the back patio. Sorry, kitties, we’re going to keep you in a bit and give the opossum time to move on.