A Day Like Others

They went to the library

because three new books were on hold,

ready for pick up

and they’d finished six books

so they needed to be returned.

Then they walked around town,

enjoying the mild spring day,

before deciding to go to the Co-op.

Because it’d been so long.

While they were there,

they picked up sandwiches,

chips,

and locally baked pastries.

Then walked back up to the car

and got a library book each,

and walked through the breeze in the park’s sun and shade

until they found a picnic table.

Whereupon they sat,

eating and reading in silence

until two hours later,

when she said,

“I’m cold. Let’s go home.”

The Animal Update

“Hold your horses,”

A little bird told me,

grinning like a Cheshire cat.

“A fly on the wall says,

he used to drink like a fish,

but he’s gone cold turkey.

Now he’s happy as a clam

though lazy as a dog.

Busy as a bee

feathering his nest.

As cute as a bug’s ear

in his cat’s pyjamas,

mad as a hatter,

but quiet as a mouse,

maybe because the cat got his tongue.”

I always thought him the cat’s meow,

sly as a fox

but crazy as a loon,

a night owl willing to party

until the cows come home.

Overheard Confession

“No one is putting anything up my ass. Sorry, no colonoscopy. This policy is traced to something done to me when I was a child. I don’t know the backstory but my auntie prevailed on my mother to give me an enema. Other than vowing to never let anything go up my ass ever again, I’ve blocked out all memory of it. I believe that Mom regretted it to her death. Whatever it was, whatever happened, I found the equipment in the hall closet, got a pair of scissors, and cut it all up. I was four years old.”

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