Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floofus Mirabilis – (floofinition) – A wonderful animal.
In use: “Many people think their pet is a floofus mirabilis, overlooking their floofgressions, such as stealing food or sleeping where they weren’t supposed to, which, though exasperating, was also charming.”
Floofserver (floofinition) – Floof expression for the human who feeds them.
In use: “Barb called the cats but she wasn’t the floofserver so they ignored her, waiting for Mitchell’s appearance, because he was their floofserver.”
Floofword (floofinition) – 1. Human words which animals seem to understand or know.
In use: “Animals often quickly pick up floofwords like ‘no’, ‘stop’, ‘food’, ‘treat’, and ‘walk’, but will frequently demonstrate selective comprehension.”
2. Command or order issued by an animal.
In use: “When she went to get out of bed, the dog said, “Ermerumphf,” his floofword which meant, ‘Stop moving around, peasant’.”
The end of the world was coming in fourteen minutes, according to the news reports on television.
He checked his phone. Still no bars. The news said that the phone system was overloaded and several satellites had already been lost. Fox, NBC, CBS, ABC, and MSNBC were all saying the same thing. He couldn’t check the net because it was still down, probably so they could control the information. Control information, and you control the mind.
Yeah, it was all fake news and bullshit. Bleating to control the masses. Opening a beer, he turned the channel, searching for a ball game or some kind of sports distraction. Weird, but no baseball or basketball games were in progress anywhere. ESPN was off the air. So were the cable sports networks. He slammed his beer down, spilling some. Such fucking bullshit! This was a bigger hoax than the goddamn moon landing.
He turned on the oven and prepared to bake a frozen pizza. Better than nothing, because going out would require human contact and most humans that he encountered were idiots.
Glancing outside, he realized that he was hearing a growing roar. Well, what the hell is going on out there, he wondered. Picking up his gun, he went to the door and stepped out.
His last words were, “What the – “
Then the fake news slammed into him, disintegrating his body, gun, and home.
Michael Seidel, writer 