Floof Chest
Floof Chest (floofinition) – 1. Box or crate where animal toys or supplies are kept.
In use: “In many households, the traditional floof chest has been replaced by a floof drawer, floof cupboard, or even a floof closet, as homes add animals, toys, supplies, and leashes.”
2. Stiffness or discomfort incurred by an animal sleeping on someone’s upper body.
In use: “Sophia had a mild case of floof chest after she let her new puppy sleep on her all afternoon.”
Floofshido
Floofshido (floofinition) – Code of honor among animals which emphasizes loyalty, trust, and patience.
In use: “According to United Federation of Floofs studies, most adherents of floofshido among housepets are dogs, with few cats adopting the code.”
Floofsticate
Floofsticate (floofinition) – To live among animals or with animals, or to live a life involving animals. Not to be confused with floofticate. Related: rusticate.
In use: “The COVID-19 pandemic saw a surge in pet ownership as more humans chose to floofsticate with animals, a recognition of the warmth, comfort, and friendship that animals offer.”
Floofstress
Floofstress (floofinition) – 1. Force or influence caused by an animal.
In use: “Joan and Carrie would love to travel more but the floofstress brought on by adopting several special needs animals kept them at home.”
2. Pressure or anxiety brought on by an animal.
In use: “Whenever he’d not seen his cats for an hour, he went and found them, assuring himself that they were okay, alleviating the floofstress which he felt.”
3. Female animal who has power, authority, or ownership.
In use: “Moose outweighed his mother by two to one but she was the house floofstress, and he obeyed her just like the other ‘normal’ sized felines and dogs.”
Floof Squared
Floof Squared (floofinition) – Economic principle that costs involving animals will be exponentially larger than reasonably anticipated.
In use: “Knowing of the floof squared rule, Ron expected pet food to be expected, but with recent inflation, the costs of feeding his cats and dog were through the roof.”
Refloofdiate
Refloofdiate (floofinition) – An animal’s unconditional rejection of an object, food, order, activity, or request.
In use: “She went to pet Buster’s silky fur, but the dog put a paw on top of her hand, staying her motion, refloofdiating her approach. Although she laughed, she was surprised and a little hurt, wondering why he was doing that.”
Servflooftude
Servflooftude (floofinition) – A condition in which someone is a slave to an animal.
In use: “Although no formal agreement was ever signed or anything like that, Beda realized after getting a cat that she was now in servflooftude, subject to the little black feline’s whims, moods, and demands to be fed and entertained.”
Floofgressor
Floofgressor (floofinition) – Animal who breaks rules or violates boundaries.
In use: “Mitzi was a new kitten in the house and an immediate floofgressor, climbing on everything, jumping where she shouldn’t be, looking and acting so damn cute that they never disciplined her.”
Michael Seidel, writer 