Floofcretion

Floofcretion (floofinition) 1. A product of animal discharges, body ejections, shedding, etc.. Origins: 1846, from A Home Guide for Life with Animals.

In Use: “Michael loved his cats but admitted that their floofcretion — hairballs, shedded fur and whiskers, and litter box donations — sometimes wore him out.”

2. The quality of an animal’s ability to be cautious or reserved. Origins: Middle flooflish from the 14th century.

In Use: “The two puppies were completely different, with Normal being the soul of floofcretion, never barking or whining, always happy and gently playful, while his sister, Abby, terrorized feet, shoes, socks, and furniture, raging with loud barks and growls whenever anyone exercised the temerity to approach the house.”

3. Ability to right to judge, rule, or govern an animal’s sounds, activities, or behavior. Origins: 17th century, noted first written use found in A Book of Rulings for the Governance of Animals in Homes.

In Use: “Many humans think that if they let animals like cats and dogs into their homes, floofcretion is theirs by fiat, but the animals often turn the tables on humans when it comes to matters like what the animal can eat, where they can sleep, what they can attack, when they can race around the house…and other irritating but endearing flooftivities.”

Apflooftude

Apflooftude (floofinition) – A natural ability to understand animals. Origins: First noted in the 17th century in an instruction pamphlet titled A Treatise on Travel with Animals, published in France, author unknown.

In Use: “Just when people begin priding themselves on their apfllooftude, the furry floofy floofballs demonstrate bewildering behavior that defies people’s grasp about what’s going on.”

Ineflooftable

Ineflooftable (floofinition) – An animal who cannot be avoided, resisted, or changed. Origins: Circa 1623, first noted in print, 1801, The Ineflooftable: How Animals Change Lives & Free Humans.

In Use: “Many talk about the ‘cat distribution system’, wherein an ineflooftable feline shows up and decides, ‘you’re my human’ and makes themselves at home.”

Flooftronage

Flooftronage (floofinition) – The support or influence of an animal honored, chosen, or named as a special protector, supporter, or guardian. Origins: 1707, from The Book of Floofs & Other Mysteries.

In Use: “Bogart’s flooftronage was apparent the first day Megan was brought home, approving her with a thorough sniffing, warming the infant with his furry body, attentive to every cry and motion she made, ready to defend her against the world and oversee her upbreaking.”

Infloofspection

Infloofspection (floofinition) – Reflective examination of animals that enhance understanding of their moods or behavior. Origins: Circa 1777, Floofin introspectus, past participle of introspicere to look inside, from intro- + specere to look + floof, for animal.

In Use: “Living with five dogs, seven cats (and counting), and several pigs, goats, birds, and a turtle, Kiki developed her infloofspection skills before she was seven.”

In Use: “Modern floofcologists have noted that human infloofspection skills are improving, in large part because of videos people share about what their furry, feathered, and scaled companions are doing, often telling why.”

Gesfloofilate

Gesfloofilate (floofinition) 1. Using non-verbal language to emphasize commands or orders given to animals. Origins: circa 1809, Flooftin roots, gesfloofulatus.

In Use: “Finding the cat on the kitchen counter preparing to take some cooling bacon, Cory shouted “No, Trouble, get down,” and gesfloofilated by snapping her fingers and stamping a foot.”

2. Non-verbal motions animals employ to ask favor or help from humans.

In Use: “Stopping by Josh’s desk, Suggs gesfloofilated for attention with a wagging tail and raised ears and paw.”

Floof-to-Table

Floof-to-Table (floofinition) – Philosophy among pets that whenever food is taken to the table, they go to the table. Origins: Internet, 2025

In Use: “Following Mama Girl’s lead, the kittens quickly assimilated the rewards of the floof-to-table movement.”

Floof Bod

Floof Bod (floofinition) – Physical appearance of an average person who lives with pets. Origins: Internet, 2025.

In Use: “Megan thought her floof bod was probably due to not exercising enough, and planned her cats and dogs because every time she sat down, floofs would pile on her to nap, and she just didn’t want to disturb her sweet little friends.”

Ad Floof

Ad Floof (floofinition) – An animal assembly created without previous planning. Origins: Flooftin roots, with the use as given first noted in 1879.

In Use: “The ad floof convened every day whenever someone got in the kitchen to get something to eat and fur beasts wandered in to see what’s cooking.”

In Use: “Carrie left the house for a walk only to discover an ad floof of deer, dog, squirrel, and cat plotting in the front yard.”

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑