Flooftub (floofinition) – A typically wide, open, deep, and round container used for holding  water, growing plants, etc., repurposed by pets as sleeping, hiding, and playing spaces.

In use: “During hot days, Ashley converted the main tub into a flooftub, stretching her long furry body out along the cool, porcelain bottom for afternoon naps that none dared to interrupt.”



Tollfloof (floofinition) – housepet who blocks a common passage such as the stairs, a doorway, or hall, and doesn’t let others by without payment.

In use: “Dobie and Gillis were both tollfloofs. Both liked getting tolls paid on the top stair. Dobie offered his beagle belly for a rub as a toll. Gillis, though, turned on her amber-eyed target acquisition system and swatted anyone who dared to pass, but with her claws withdrawn.”


Astfloonomy (floofinition) – 1. A practice held by animals of gazing at the night sky; 2. Branch of science devoted to finding the shapes of animals in the stars.

In use: “A professor emeritus of astfloonomy, he pointed and said, “If you connect those stars, you can see a small mouse.” He looked down at the cat. “See it?” The cat did not reply, which was a reply.”


Floofvalry (floofinition) – competition between two or more housepets for superiority, food, attention, or dominance.

In use: “As soon as he headed toward his favorite recliner, his two ginger cats and the Corgi positioned themselves by the chair, starting the lap floofvalry anew.”


Malafloof (floofinition) – an impudently bold or saucy animal, especially housepets.

In use: “The puppy was but four pounds and arrived as a shy, withdrawn animal. Within three days, he’d found his energy, emerging as a malafloof who entertained himself by going after the cats and other dogs. The cats educated him with a few quick hisses and smacks, but the dogs indulged him, especially Whitney, who seemed amused.”


Prefloofitate (floofinition) – rash, headlong actions to help animals, esp. housepets.

In use: “Seeing the cat clinging to the bridge’s side, the four teenagers made a prefloofitate decision to save and began figuring out how to climb down the bridge’s steep, slick side.”


Floofmiliar (floofinition) – 1. A housepet who is a close friend or associate to the people living in the house. 2 Housepets who are friends with one another. 3. A demon in the form of a housepet supposedly attending and obeying a witch.

In use: “Her miniature Collies were more than pets or friends, especially Gin-gin. Gin-gin was her floofmiliar, attending every mood and acting as a confidant. Gin-gin was trustworthy and dependable, and never told anyone the secrets that she knew.”


First Floof

First Floof (floofinition) – informal or ceremonial title given to the housepet which has preferential standing.

In use: “She’d always had cats. Daisy came to her when her son went to war and never returned. Showing remarkable intelligence — for a dog, in her opinion — Daisy quietly became her loyal First Floof and was by her side when she went to sleep and didn’t wake up, staying there until the police came on a welfare check.”

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