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Lethflooflogica (floofinition) – Inability to remember an animal’s correct name. Origins: Attributed to Carl Floong, borrowed from ancient Fleek.
In Use: “Bunchy had acquired so many names — neighbors called him one thing, different family members referred to him by other names like Sparky, Blackie, Onyx, and he’d come to the family with a foster name — that the pet sitter often suffered lethflooflogica and referred first to the other animals’ names before landing on Bunchy.”
Floofitorium (floofinition) – Hall, building, room, or space used for a gathering of animals. Origins: 1640, borrowed from the Flooftin, from floof “animal” + -tōrium, suffix of places.
In Use: “The way the cats and dogs took over the new house’s sun room, it was immediatly referred to as the floofitorium.”
In Use: “Although not the sunniest room, the spacious living room was carpeted and quiet, with several large houseplants, encouraging the household pets to treat it as their own floofitorium during late autumn and winter.”
In Use: “Her home office was a tiny place, but the animals all crowded in with Priscilla, leading her to laughingly tell others that she worked in a floofitorium.”
We share our house with two floofs. Both are cats, strays that decided to call our place home. One is Papi, the ginger blade, also referred to as Meep and Butter Butt. The alpha cat is Tucker (pronounced Tuck-ah), a black and white mixed fur cat with shades of Maine Coon. He’s older by several years.
Tucker has recently taken to not responding to me. Not responding, that is, until I mention Papi’s name. I can and do say, “What’s up, Tucker, are you hungry, what do you want,” etc., and get nothing. But if I say, “What is it, Papi?” Whoa, Tucker turns and marches over.
In my mind, I attribute this whole thing to Tucker trying to trick me into thinking he’s Papi. When I call Tucker by Papi’s name, Tucker is thinking, “I did it! He thinks I’m the other cat.”
As anyone who lives with an animal knows, this is basic flooflighting.
Flooflemma (floofinition) – A usually unpleasant choice faced by an animal. Origins: First known use in 1523 in Europe.
In Use: “Facing a major flooflemma between being bored in the house or being outside where it was cold, Papi chose to keep going in and out, causing some friction with his hooman room mates.”
In Use: “Forced into the flooflemma of not eating or eating food she didn’t like, Sunshine lived up to the Floof Code and walked away from the food.”
Floofcake (floofinition) – 1. Term of endearment for a sweet animal. Origins: 1829
In Use: “Rachel often referred to her chubby yorkie as her floofcake, an expression which the dog accepted but did not like.”
2. Wrestling move by many animals to dominate others by throwing their dead weight down on them. Origins: 1932, United States
In Use: “No more than twelve pounds when she was wet, Caramel would put herself on top of Cassie and pin Cassie in bed like Caramel weighed a hundred pounds.”
Floofsimilar (floofinition) An animal that looks or acts amazingly like another. Origins: Medieval Flooftin.
In Use: “Goof and Ball were different species but with almost the exact same black and white markings and chill, friendly personalities, were spooky floofsimilars.”
In Use: “Mark went out looking for his big black white cat. A week later, his cat showed up, and he realized that the first cat was a floofsimilar.”
Floofybeat (floofinition) – Style or sub-genre of rock or pop music which incorporates animal sounds or approximations of animal styles. Origins: USA circa 1965.
In Use: “The Kiffness creates floofybeat videos of cats ‘singing’ tunes.”
In Use: “‘Li’l Red Riding Hood’ by Sam the Sham and the Pharoahs is a 1966 pop song that incorporates a wolf howl, qualifying it as floofybeat music.”
Floofstruse (floofinition) – An animal who is difficult to comprehend, predict, or understand. Origins: December 1, 2024, Ashlandia, Oregon, USA.
In Use: “Even after ten years of living with Corky, he was a floofstruse enigma, alternatively loving, sweet, and friendly, and then sullen, remote, and sad.”
In Use: “Bob always told others that Lucy was floofstruse, usually happy, sweet, and playful, but then another side emerged, and she became Lucifer.”
Vagafloof (floofinition) – An animal who enjoys wandering. Origins: 15th century Middle Floofish.
In Use: “As much as he cringed from what could happen to Turbo, Patrick accepted that his pet was a vagfloof, familiar to all of the neighbors in a radius of several blocks.”
In Use: “Although now a fair-weather floof, Mouse (a misnomer if ever there was one) was a vagafloof in the house, visiting Carol while she worked in the office, and periodically checking on all rooms and activities thoughout the day.”
Floofingent (floofinition) – A decision or activity conditional on an animal’s mood, activity, behavior, or decision. Origins: 15th century, Middle Flooflish, borrowed from Middle Froof & Medfloofal Latin.
In Use: “Invited out for a holiday dinner, Bob hedged, telling others that his cat seemed down, so his attendance was floofingent on her.”
In Use: “Barb’s acceptance of men in her life was largely floofingent on her dogs’ reaction to the guys she brought home. If the dogs said no, the relationship was done.”
Michael Seidel, writer 