Trump Administration (TA): Woke ruined everything! White men are being discriminated against! It’s not fair to white men!
MAGA: Yea! Woke sucks!
TA: Cities – especially blue cities – are the economic engines of the US. So let’s send ICE there and disrupt flights into them and cause a slowdown there because we don’t like them and their woke liberal policies.
MAGA: Yea! Libruls suck.
TA: Companies will move out of blue cities and blue states to red states.
MAGA: Yeah! Libruls suck.
Blue States: Even though the nation is going through a drought and there’s less and less water available to drink?
MAGA: Fake news!
TA: We have plenty of water, don’t worry. There is a drought going on, don’t worry. It’s weather! Louisiana isn’t sinking, don’t worry. The glaciers aren’t melting, don’t worry. The sea level isn’t rising, don’t worry. The average temperature isn’t rising, don’t worry. That’s all a Chinese Democrat Deep State hoax.
MAGA: Yeah! Hoax!
Media and Economists: The tariffs and war in Iran are driving up oil prices and disrupting supply chains. That increases energy and fertilizer prices. That raises transportation and shipping costs, food prices, healthcare costs, and consumer goods prices.
TA: Prices might go up a little bit for food but don’t worry, we’ll be better off for it in the long run.
MAGA: Um…yeah.
TA: Don’t worry about the national debt, either. We’re all going to get so rich, it’ll be beautiful.
MAGA: Yeah.
Media and Economists: The rising prices will also affect insurance premiums because they’re tied to the costs of everything else. Insurance is also going up for many homeowners due to more extreme weather events and wildfires.
MAGA:
TA: Forget the Epstein files! It’s a Democrat hoax! They’ve all been released. They’re nothing.
MAGA: Grumble grumble grumble
TA: Look at this ballroom! Isn’t it beautiful? It’s the biggest and most beautiful in the world!
MAGA:
TA: Donors are paying for the ballroom! It’ll only cost 200 million! 300 million! 400 million! We need a billion dollars to make it safe!
MAGA:
TA: And look at this 250th celebration of our nation. Look at this fight we’re staging at the White House!
Media: It’s just like the Coliseum in Rome. Or the Olympic Games in Berlin before World War II.
MAGA:
TA: We’re winning the war in Iran! It’s already over! We obliterated their military! There is no more threat from Iran! It’s all or nothing! They’re running on fumes there! The people are going to rise up and take over! The Strait of Hormuz will be open, or else! We’ll bomb them more! The clock is ticking! They must give up their nuclear program! We destroyed their nuclear program! They have nothing!
MAGA:
Media: Trump has gone golfing today. He’s golfed 23% of the time he’s been in office.
MAGA:
TA: Biden!
MAGA: Biden sucks!
Michael Seidel, writer 