Floonergy
Floonergy (floofinition) – 1. The animation, action, and movement demonstrated by animals. Origins: 1974, United States.
In Use: “A pile of puppies’ floonergy can overwhelm many households; having children on hand to watch and play with them is a good counterstrategy.”
In Use: “The cat demonstrated huge levels of floonergy as a kitten, accepting every challenge to climb curtains, take over the ceiling fan, and lounge in a room’s tallest places, and she kept that same floonergy until her middle teens, impressing everyone.”
Recent Use: “Videos of pets demonstrating their floonergy permeate the net, where viewers marvel over animals galloping around a house and leaping over furniture.”
2. Calming influence cast by animals over others.
In Use: “Reaching home, Carmel immediately removed her shoes and sat down. Her cats joined her, spreading their relaxing floonergy over her and extinguishing her work weariness.”
Recent Use: “Although a huge dog, Master G radiated a peaceful floonergy which immediately relaxed those in the same room.”
Flooftrigue
Flooftrigue (floofinition) – Secret or underhanded floofinations done by animals. Origins: 1676, France.
In Use: “Nobody could understand how the kittens were escaping their safe room every day until a camera was installed and caught the flooftrigue as the Retriever sniffed the door and then then opened it, letting the kittens loose before nosing the door closed.”
Recent Use: “People in Texas were intrigued by Cleo the cat burglar and the flooftrigue around his stealing antics that were caught on camera.”
Smooflooing
Smooflooing (floofinition) – Covering an animal with an excessive number of kisses.
In Use: “Barbie loved finding her cat, Hamilton asleep on the bed (which was his favorite place to nap day and night) and smooflooing his belly, which always brought his bright green eyes open and a deep, throbbing purr.”
In Use: “Withng a month of being adopted, Cameron had taught his people to begin smooflooing his face and belly whenever the big lab threw himself, whether it was on a walk, in the house, or in the backyard or driveway.”
Recent Use: “The web has become a repository of videos of people smooflooing their pets, especially cats and dogs.”
Lootching
Lootching (floofinition) – Combined stretching and looking at something by an animal who has been sleeping. Origins: Internet, US, 2023
In Use: “Walking into the bedroom, he awoke his floof, who responded with some intense lootching before curling into another sleeping position and resuming his nap.”
In Use: “The dogs and cats conducted synchronized lootching when Carrie walked in, and then pause, watching to see if she offered food, before returning to their snoozing.”
Recent Use: “An ancient Floofverb states, ‘There’s no lootching among distrustful animals.'”
Viafloofor
Viafloofor (floofinition) – An animal, especially pet, who enjoys traveling or walking around by themselves. Origins: ancient Rome
In Use: “Charlie, a chunky ginger boi, was a regular viafloofor, walking the sidewalks and visiting homes and businesses as though he followed a schedule, which was useful for being served pets and treats.”
In Use: “Bear was never much of a viafloofor, preferring his bed or a comfortable warm spot of sun-kissed lawn in the backyard, to walking around, unless it was to greet his people or make an acquaintance with something to eat.”
Recent Use: “OMwazeng on YouTube has a video of a cat named Dodger, a viafloofor who takes the bus every day.”
Floogi
Floogi (floofinition) – An especially mystical or reflective animal. Origins: Floofskrit. First known use, 1613.
In Use: “Sienna had owned many cats and dogs, and often thought most of the cats had mystical qualities, but Samuel Jackson was the first dog she had who seemed like a floogi.”
In Use: “Jade often set up in a serene and watchful pose, her emerald eyes partially closed, a floogi contemplating existence.”
Recent Use: “Felines’ propensity to often seem like floogis has given rise on the net to posts with cats looking serene while saying something counter to the moment, such as, ‘I may look sweet but forget to feed me on time and my mittens of death will tear you a new one.'”
Floofspeak
Floofspeak (floofinition) – An implanted device used by animals to speak to other species. Origins: first suspected by humans during witch trails in the American Colonies in the 1700s.
In Use: “Although ‘implanted’ is the term used, many floofocologists now believe that floofspeak is either a quantum matter or magic, as no implanted devices have ever been found.”
In Use: “Animals often sit mutely staring at humans as they attempt to use floofspeak to converse, but then will leave in exasperation, or resort to coarse noises to speak with the humans.”
Recent Use: “An Irish floofocologist, Kitty McAleer, claimed to have found significant revelations about floofspeak in a set of recovered documents collectively known as the The Floofy Codices. Although stored in a secure place, the documents disappeared before they could be made public, including digital photographs which were initially made. Ms McAleer cites the document’s disappearance as clear evidence of “animals’ unique, even supernatural skills to access places”, and believes her house pet, a Tom named Phelan, provided inside intelligence which aided the thieves.”
Floofpertoire
Floofpertoire (floofinition) – 1. A stock of moves, looks, sounds, or behavior that an animal knows or uses to control, coerce, or manipulate humans. Origins: Late Latin
In Use: “Many animals seem to develop a floofpertoire for how to get humans to cozy up to them, feed them treats, and keep them safe, and it seems like it might just be a gift shared through some great floofscious in the sky.”
Recent Use: “As with many human endeavors, more discussion has recently arisen about whether animals and their floofpertoire is a matter more of nurture or nature.”
2. Behavior, tricks, and sounds employed by humans to train, control, coerce, or manipulate animals.
In Use: “People in different countries learn how to talk to animals in their own language, but there does seem to be a universal floofpertoire for successfully domesticating animals.”
Recent Use: “Facebook, Reddit, and YouTube are all exploding with new tricks to add to your floofpertoire to gain animals’ trust, bring them back home, or to get them safe, happy, healthy, and entertained.”
FAC
FAC: Floof Action Committee (floofinition) – 1. A consortium of animals joining together to achieve change or direct policy.
In Use: “The household pets knew where the treats were stored and egged on by the dog, formed a FAC to get to them. The cat was most instrumental, jumping onto the kitchen counter and then to the refrigerator’s top to knock the packets to the floor, but the dogs were the ones who tore them open for all to enjoy.”
Recent Use: “On a cold winter night, a dog found a small niche of shelter where she could stay warm. Soon another dog, and then a cat joined him, sharing their warmth and shelter, and creating a de facto survival FAC.”
2. A group of humans dedicated to helping and, or, saving animals, and ensuring their health and welfare are attended to.
In Use: “Many communities have volunteers which form a FAC to reduce the feral populations with spay-neuter-release programs, and have parallel programs to find the young and have them fostered, domesticated, and adopted.
Recent Use: “With wars and military actions reducing places to terrifying scenes of burned-out rubble, global FACs have formed to find and save the innocent animals, giving them food and medical treatment, and shipping them out to safe places as needed and able.”
Michael Seidel, writer 