Tag: dog

Magna Cata

Magna Cata (floofinition) – legendary charter of rights signed by feline representatives. Reports vary about where the Magna Cata was signed and its fate. One enduring theory suggests that Noah was forced to create the document to entice two cats to board the ark, but then burned it after the waters rose.

In use: “The dog smirked at the cat. “The Magna Cat no longer exists,” he said. “Some stupid cat started playing with it and tore it up.” Seeing the cat’s baleful gaze, the dog said, “At least, that’s what I’ve always been told.””

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Floofercise

Floofercise (floofinition) – exercise achieved by interaction with a housepet; exercise routines used by housepets.

In use: “Every day, the young orange cat walked up to the person when she emerged from the bedroom and mewed in greeting, and then jumped into a floofercise routine, galloping around the room as though an invisible rider had applied spurs to the cat.”

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Floofmiration

Floofmiration (floofinition) – a feeling of wonder, pleasure, or approval about a housepet; a housepet’s demonstration of wonder, pleasure, or approval about an object or being.

In use: “It was a mutual floofmiration process, with the cat on the man’s lap, gazing at him with adoration as the man stroked the cat’s gray fur, and the two dogs lounged on the sofa on either side, relaxed and comfortable.”

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Floofversive

Floofversive (floofinition) – a housepet seeking or intending to subvert an established system or hierarchy.

In use: “The big boxer knew he was the resident king, but the new puppy was an unaware floofversive.”

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Floofhaha

Floofhaha (floofinition) – an uproar caused by a housepet.

In use: “A floofhaha erupted when one cat jumped onto the table – where no animal was authorized – and the beagle started barking to alert the people about the crime, causing the flighty young tabby cat to leap off the window sill to a coffee table, where they slid into houseplant, sending it crashing to the floor.”

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Floofculent

Floofculent (floofinition) – a housepet who is aggressively defiant.

In use: “”Get off the table, you floofculent beast,” she said, squirting the cat again. Emitting a long, scornful meow, the small tuxedo fellow hunkered down, but stayed on the table.”

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Floofjacent

Floofjacent (floofinition) – a housepet’s propensity for sitting or laying beside their people, or staying close to them as people walk around.

In use: “He noticed that his pets – three dogs and two cats – always sought to be floofjacent to him. As a game, he would begin walking in one direction, wait until the pets were all floofjacent, and then suddenly change directions and rush away. They quickly caught on to his ruse, except for the beagle, who was always getting distracted.”

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Floofeiture

Floofeiture (floofinition) – the loss or giving up of something to a pet, most often in reference to furniture, but also used in connection with food.

In use: “Finally admitting the he needed to get up to pee, he reluctantly did so, knowing that doing so meant floofeiture to one of the animals waiting to take his seat. If he had to bet on it, he would say the corgi would win.”

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Floofkin

Floofkin (floofinition) – an animal with a bright orange color or markings that resembles a pumpkin; an indulgent nickname for a pet.

In use: “”Hey floofkin,” he said as the bright orange tabby ran up to him. Its tail was straight up except for a crook at the end. “Want something to eat?”

“”Mew,” the kitty replied, rubbing against the man’s leg.”

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Cofloofitate

Cofloofitate (floofinition) – to share a place with pets; pets of different species sharing a dwelling.

In use: “Cofloofitating with dogs, cats, and birds, he was surprised by their demonstrated intelligence and compassion. They comforted not only him when he was sick or sad, but watched over one another, too.”

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