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Lafloofchezia (floofinition) – The use of vulgar or foul language with a housepet to relieve stress or pain.
In use: “The cat was sprawled on its back on the floor, its silky belly exposed to the sun. Naturally, Cheryl thought it was safe to give the cat a tummy rub. A split second later, the cat had scratched her arm and hand, and she was sitting back, delivering lafloofchezia.”
Conflooferacy (floofinition) – a league or alliance between housepets for some purpose.
In use: “Recognizing one another’s skill sets and how they could help one another, the cats and dogs established a conflooferacy. For example, a cat could jump up, hang from the door handle and turn it while a dog pushed the door open, allowing them all to escape as the bird stood lookout and called out warnings.”
Obfloofurate (floofinition) – a housepet who is stubbornly persistent in wrongdoing.
In use: “Although he moved the doughnuts and sprayed Crystal with water to dissuade her, the little Bombay Black with golden eyes and velvet fur was an obfloofurate miscreant, constantly stealing and eating his mini powdered-sugar doughnuts.”
Floofumbra (floofinition) – a housepet that shadows you from a short distance.
In use: “The little Corgi was a floofumbra, following him from space to space in the house, but stopping at the entries to watch and guard him from across the room.”
Floofathon (floofinition) – a housepet’s race around the house, usually on an erratic course, and often at bewilderingly high speeds, typically lasting for several minutes, and usually with uncertain origins or causes; something (such as an event, activity, or session) characterized by a housepet’s great concentrated effort.
In use: “In an impressive floofathon that lasted over an hour, the four cats gathered at the window and watched the noisy little sparrows at the bird feeder.”
Floofmotic (floofinition) – of or relating to common housepets, especially their speech.
In use: “When it came to her pets, she took a gothic, floofmotic approach, dropping to her hands and knees to bark, purr, whine and mew.”
Archfloof (floofinition) – a perfect example of a housepet, such as a cat, dog, or bird.
In use: “She, petite, clean, quiet, and loving — except when birds or squirrels rushed past in a noisy flurry outside, or she got into the catnip and acted a little crazy — was the archfloof of domesticated felines, happily living from can to can and treat to treat, snuggling up to her lady at night, comforting the woman with a brush of whiskers, a kiss of fur, and a whisper of purrs.”
Floof-de-lis (floofinition) – a housepet in a position among lilies.
In use: “His Yorkie delighted in hiding in the backyard lilies like a floof-de-lis, a trait that endeared the little rescue dog to him.”
Floofmaging (floofinition) – a pet’s attempt to claim a person by putting fur on the person’s clothing, typically by sleeping on clothing when the person takes it off and puts it down.
In use: “As soon as he took off his coat and put it on the chair, two cats approached, intent on floofmaging the coat for themself.”
Raison d’floof (floofinition) – the reason or justification for having housepets
In use: “The latest addition was a kitten, which increased the housepet’s population to twelve, including the birds. Their raison d’floof was that the cat needed a home, and they could provide it.”
Michael Seidel, writer 