Flooftender (floofinition) – a housepet who lays claim to head pet throne who is held to have no just title.
In use: “The new cat thought she’d make herself queen, but the established calico soon taught the flooftender her place.”
Mettlefloof
Mettlefloof (floofinition) – a spirited housepet; a housepet full of vigor and stamina.
In use: “The household was used to quiet, dignified pets. The new mettlefloof of a lab puppy was anything but quiet and dignified, shaking it up with gallops around the house, invitations to wrestle, and eating any food found anywhere.”
Dutifloof
Dutifloof (floofinition) – conscientiously or obediently fulfilling one’s duty to their pets; a housepet who remains loyal and conscientious toward others.
In use: “She had a meager income, but she was dutifloof, ensuring that her miniature collies had the best foods and medical treatment possible. They were her best friends and a comforting presence. Making them happy and keeping them safe made her happy.”
Floofloaf
Floofloaf (floofinition) – a housepet that resembles a rolled up towel or a loaf of bread; a healthy pet that prefers not to move around, but lazes in one spot; a person who doesn’t change positions because a pet is on them.
In use: “He’d been a young fighter when they’d brought the orange kitten into the house but within a year, he became a floofloaf who enjoyed nothing more than a good nap, a warm lap, and a bit of kibble a few times a day.”
Floofxiety
Floofxiety (floofinition) – worrying about a housepet; a housepet’s worry about a noise, activity, or another animal.
In use: “He was on vacation, staying at a lovely beach house, but floofxiety flooded him when he heard about a wildfire near his town. He didn’t care if he lost his house or its contents. He just wanted to ensure his cats and dogs were safe.”
Floofgry
Floofgry (floofintion) – a hungry, drowsy look that housepets use when they’ve been asleep and are awakened by the sound of an opening container.
In use: “Hearing him open a new package of toilet paper, the small orange tabby raised his head and favored him with a floofgry look.”
Quadrafloof
Quadrafloof (floofinition) – surrounded by four housepets.
In use: “Quadrafloof was the normal situation when he and his wife settled down in the evening. The cats took the laps, the dog took an end, and the bird took a shoulder. Then, eating popcorn and watching a movie was the standard practice until the popcorn was gone, all were asleep, and the television went on with its broadcasting.”
Foot-floof
Foot-floof (floofinition) – a housepet who likes to sit or lay on someone’s foot or feet as part of their expression of affection.
In use: “He didn’t know where and how they’d learn it but whenever he stopped, the dog sat on one foot and the cat sat on the other, rendering it impossible to ignore them. He believed that was the plan. They never got on his lap; they always were on a foot, originating their nickname, the foot-floofs.”
Subfloofinal
Subfloofinal (floofinition) – a housepet’s ability to do something without people noticing.
In use: “Despite her awareness that the cats were fond of stealing food off her plate and had dibs on anything brought into the house, she put her plate on the table beside her and sat down to read. When she did, her Bombay Black employed subfloofinal tactics to steal several pieces and take them to the floor, where she and the other two cats happily devoured them.”
Misfloofievous
Misfloofievous (floofinition) – irresponsibly playful housepet; a housepet who’s playful in a naughty, teasing way.
In use: “Smart and misfloofievous, the black lab quickly understood the people’s patterns and habits. Being people of habit, they retired to the den to watch television in the evenings. As soon as one went that direction, she raced ahead, found the remote control, picked it up in her and began a game of keep-away. She was always pulling floofnanigans.”
Michael Seidel, writer 