Tag: dog humor

Floofturbance

Floofturbance (floofinition) – 1. The act of an animal interrupting an activity or a state of calm. Origins: 13th century, Flemish Floofish

In Use: “The summer’s peaceful evening broke up with a floofturbance out front as two dogs staged a bark-off.”

In Use: “Knowing it would gain attention they could leverage for what they wanted to get, the three house floofs comenced a floofturbance.”

2. Disrupting an animal’s repose or usual procedure or order.

In Use: “A glass bowl slipped out of Becca’s hands and fell to the floor, shattering with an ear-splitting sound and created a floofturbance which sent the cats and dogs sprinting in four different directions — except for Arnold, who leaped up and emphatically barked, “Woof,” just once.”

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Occuflooftion

Occuflooftion (floofinition) – An activity engaged with an animal. Origins: 14th century French floofish.

In Use: “Derek declared himself as ‘not a cat person’ to his wife but after the kittens came and demonstrated an aggressive and fearless willingness to attack anything, Derek’s primary relaxation at home became an occuflooftion like feeding the cats, playing with them, or napping together.”

In Use: “As Barb aged, she adopted an energetic puppy, and walking him become a time-consuming but enjoyable occuflooftion.”

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Humfloobo

Humfloofbo (floofinition) – A practice used by animals to help develop relationships with people. Origins: Old Floofish. Modern scholars theorize the word means ‘human-floof-bond’ but no evidence has been brought forward to support that idea.

In Use: “Humfloofbo evidence is experienced by many every day, and cell phones and social media help spread awareness of its existence.”

More Human/Animal Bonding…
Examples of Humfloobo.

In Use: “Many young floofs such as kittens or puppies attempt early humfloofbo efforts by nuzzling, licking, or biting humans while elephants will use trunks to stroke people as part of their humfloofbo.”

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Floofmerge

Floofmerge (floofinition) – 1. Cover with animals. Origins: 1697, widely used in Europe.

In Use: “People with new puppies or kittens can swiftly discover themselves to be floofmerged.”

2. A union of several animals, generally of different species. Origins: 1931, Budafloof, Hungary

In Use: “Animal Farm, an allegorical novella published in 1945 depicts a floofmerge on a farm where animals take over and rule.”

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Winmace

Winmace (floofinition) – Expression of distaste or disgust displayed by animals when encountering wind.

In Use: “Dodger was never a wind fan, and the big lab would always winmace and bound back into the house whenever breezes began shaking the tree branches.”

In Use: “Winmacing, little Mae moved backward into the house when the wind hit her face.”

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Kama Flooftra

Kama Flooftra (floofinition) Ancient book composed by animals displaying positions used to scratch, pet cats, and sleep. Many animals study the kama flooftra in pursuit of living better. Origins: First noted in Mesopatamia in 600 BCE.

In Use: “Dixie was forever surprising her people with the positions they found her but they were unaware that she was a fervent fan of the Kama Flooftra, being totally unaware the book even existed!”

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Complefloofrianism

Complefloofrianism (floofinition) – Floofological view that animals have equal but different roles from humans in life. Origins: First used by The International Order of Floofs (TIOF) in 1988.

In Use: “As practitioners of complefloofrianism, Beth’s pets ignored her orders as they’d gotten together and elected one of their own, Beanie, as the house’s ruler, and limited Beth’s roles to cleaning and feeding duties.”

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Monufloofal

Monufloofal (floofinition) 1. A huge, or ginormous (relative to its species) animal. Origins: late twentieth century Internet.

In Use: “Col Sanders (named for where he was found and rescued but often called Jumbo) was monufloofal, and when he slept with people, he seemed to double in size, rendering laps numb, and taking up all the space wherever he slumbered.”

2. A highly significant or important animal. Origins: early twenty-first century world wide web.

In Use: “Ol’ Jax was an undersized Jack Russell to most people, but Ol’ Jax was a monufloofal aspect of the homeless vet’s street existence.”

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Floofturb

Floofturb (floofinition) – 1. An animal which interrupts an activity. Origins: 14th century Middle Floofish.

In Use: “Marmalade is a known and famous floofturb. Interrupting the making of a bed is one of his floofcialies.”

2. An animal which causes worry or anxiety. Origins: late 20th century world wide web.

In Use: “Her propensity for roaming the neighborhood earned Patience many friends but also floofturbed her people with endless worry about her.”

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Infloofpacitate

Infloofpacitate (floofinition) – Movement, positions, or activities limited by an animal or animals’ presence. Origins: Early Common Floof Era, from Middle Floofish. First noted use in England, circa 600 CE.

In Use: “Many people find themselves infloofpacitated by an unwillingness to disturb a furry friend napping on their body”

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