Floofmonym (floofinition) – Words that incorporate terms for animals, such as catalog or dogma, or the sounds that they make.
In use: “The word “homeowner” is a floofmonym with “meow” in it.”
h/t to Barbara Froman.
Floofmonym
Floofverse
Floofverse (floofinition) – 1. Poetry about animals, especially housepets. 2. A housepet with a base that’s narrower than their top. 3. A pet that has the opposite personality or exhibits the opposite behavior from another.
In use: “The cat and dog came from different places but arrived at the same time. Firecracker, the cat, was all white, social, and energetic, while Drury, the black puppy, was Firecracker’s floofverse in all ways: quiet, shy, gentle, and retiring. Despite this, the two animals loved being together.”
Floofgon
Floofgon (floofintion) – A large container in which drink is served to housepets.
In use: “During the hot summer, multiple floofgons were placed around the house so the animals always had fresh water to keep them hydrated.”
Flooftraction
Flooftraction (floofinition) – 1. Becoming preoccupied by a housepet’s sounds or activities. 2. A thing that absorbs a housepet’s attention or interest. 3. An animal’s grip on a surface.
In use: “Birds and squirrels became a flooftraction for the cat, whose chittering was a flooftraction for the dog, whose fixed staring became a flooftraction for Marla as she went to get ready for work.”
Confloofsion
Confloofsion (floofinition) – Intimate information or insights people share with their pets.
In use: “Living in the small travel trailer with a long-haired black cat named Bob, he shared confloofsions about his drug-use and mental health during the cold and snowy Minnesota days. Speaking them aloud helped him understand who he was and what he faced. The cat never did anything more than nestle against him and purr.”
Flooflanthropist
Flooflanthropist (floofinition) – 1. An animal who protects and promotes the welfare of other animals. 2. A person who seeks to promote animal welfare, especially by generous donations.
In Use: “Parallel to the worldwide web’s rise has been a growth of flooflanthropists who reach out to rescue animals and find them homes, especially in the wake of disasters.”
Floofnami
Floofnami (floofintion) – A great wave of activity by housepets.
In use: “A floofnami swept the house as the mini-cat, Logan, still learning the ropes, found the catnip and went nuts, terrorizing the birds, alarming the other cats, and provoking the dogs into unbridled barking.”
Floofvenir
Floofvenir (floofinition) – 1. A momento or keepsake to remember a pet. 2. An article, such as a sock, pillow, stuffed animal, or shirt, that a pet keeps and sleeps with for comfort.
In use: “In a private drawer, he kept floofvenirs of the four dogs and three cats he’d owned — used collars with a locket with their name and a favorite picture. It was private, meant only for him.”
Floofears
Floofears (floofinition) – A unique hearing capability among pets that allow them to hear cans and refrigerator doors opening, rattling kibble, and package rustling, often from amazingly far distances and frequently through walls and doors.
In use: “Opening a can of food for one cat pestering him, a scratching at the door pulled his attention. Staring in through the window beside the front door, the cat meowed at him. Shaking his head, he went to the door to open it and let the cat in to be fed, even as he marveled at their floofears.”
Saturday’s Theme Music
Today’s song came by way of a cat. He went out through the pet door from the MBR, crossed the patio, came in through the living room side door, and then walked around behind me, greeting me as I came down the hall from the MBR.
Whipping my head back, I asked, “How did you get here so fast?”
He flicked his tail once and sat.
I nodded. “Everything you do is magic.” I knew, of course, that it wasn’t magic, but quantum walking. Cats are adept at walking through universes from one to another, turning up at odd times and places.
That simple phrase, though, invited the stream to begin “Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic” (The Police, 1981).
I need to watch what I say.
Michael Seidel, writer 