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Floofaneer (floofinition) – Any of the freefloofers preying on unsuspecting households by sneaking in and eating other pets’ food and treats.
In use: “A sleek black cat, Pearl was soon known around the neighborhood as a floofaneer, fearlessly ferreting out petdoors and boldly entering other homes.”
Freefloofer (floofinition) – Housepet who appears to be a stray because they’re always wandering around as though homeless.
In use: “The friendly little dog was a freefloofer who enjoyed wandering the neighborhood and making new friends. People often thought he was lost, so they took him home, fed him, and doted on him while posting on social media, ‘Lost Dog Found’. Naturally, he wasn’t a lost dog; just a freefloofer.”
Eflooftemology (floofinition) – The study or a theory of the nature and grounds of knowledge regarding animals, especially housepets or domesticated animals, with reference to the limits and validity of the knowledge.
In use: “Animals’ innate secrecy and their desire to protect their knowledge limits eflooftemology as animals often defy established ‘facts’ about their thinking, skills, and behavior.”
Floofdrant (floofinition) – A room or space divided by housepets for their use.
In use: “A floofdrant was always created along the same lines, with the older male cats taking to the easy chairs, the dogs on the sofa, and the female cat on the humans’ favorite leather recliner.”
Afloofpriate (floofinition) – When an animal, especially a houspet, acquires something for its own use or consumption.
In use: “She planned to have a nice butter croissant with apricot preserves for breakfast but her dog was faster, afloofpriating the warm food and gobbling it up as soon as she set the plate down.”
Aufloof (floofinition) – A poem or music celebrating pets or animals.
In use: “For example, “A Dog On His Master” by Billy Collins, is an almost perfect aufloof.”
Floofdiferous (floofinition) – A magnificent or splendid example of an animal. [Middle Flooflish, from Medieval Floof floofdiferus, from Late Floof floofdōrifer.]
In use: “With fiery ginger flames of long fur, and large, urgent pale jade eyes, Blur was floofdiferous, a wondrous, friendly giant of a cat.”
Dilfloofpidated (floofinition) – furniture, rugs, carpets, and other household items rendered into partial ruin through a pet’s or pets’ activities.
In use: “Often, an outward sign that a pet resides within a house are dilfloofpidated screens.”
Sunfur (floofinition) – Animal fur that’s heated by sunshine, revered for its soft heat and healing powers.
In use: “Papi bounced in with his habitual enthusiastic gallop, pausing against a calf to say hello and let his sunfur be stroked before morphing into an orange blur speeding away.”
Snowfloof (floofinition) – 1. Animal who is fond of being in the snow. 2. Snow sculpture of an animal.
In use: “The little princess, Her Most Serene Highness – yes, that’s her acquired name – wasn’t a snowfloof, oh, no, not at all, venturing out once. With each step, she shook her her paws from that disgusting stuff on her tiny paws. Within two feet, she’d realized it was falling from the sky and landing on her, and no amount of licking was resolving the problem. Well, that was it. She bolted right back into the house, cleaned herself off, and glared death at the sky for betraying her with this falling wet stuff and hiding her sunshine.”
Michael Seidel, writer 