Floof Mitzvah

Floof Mitzvah (floofinition) – Animal celebration for coming of age, borrowed from Jewish tradition. Most cats typically celebrate at least nine floof mitzvahs, while dogs and other animals usually only do one.

In use: “Mama cat decided it was time for a floof mitzvah for her five little ones, and began vigorously grooming them for the event.”


Layfloof (floofinition) – Animals who enjoys laying down and frequently indulges themselves by doing so.

In use: “The big dog was a layfloof who employed puppy eyes to get extra treats and forbidden foods (like hotdogs and pizza!) so it was necessary to begin an exercise program with him.”


Floofmentum (floofinition) – The impetus gained by an animal, especially a housepet, particularly when addressing how the animal joined a household or won someone over.

In use: “The giant parrot had to have once belonged to someone, but it’d landed in the yard and then invited itself into the house, and then, through floofmentum, came to be Lily’s best friend and constant companion.”


Infloofment (floofinition) – an accusation against a household pet such as a cat or dog.

In use: “Seeing the houseplant destroyed, its leaves scattered around the room, she turned to the cats and leveled her infloofment, demanding to know which was guilty. Both stayed silent but wide-eyed.”


Afloofium (catfinition) – fur, leaves, grass, mulch, and other similar material deposited by cats and other house pets going in and out of the house.

In use: “He’d run the robot sweeper first thing in the morning, but an hour later, a fresh layer of afloofium marked the felines’ comings and goings.”


Plethfura (catfinition) – an excessive quantity of cat fur, but also sometimes used in reference to dog fur, or animal fur in general.

In use: “With three long-hair cats, a plethfura resulted, requiring daily diligence to reduce the plethfura. If daily rituals of sweeping and vacuuming weren’t followed, the plethfuras congregated, becoming kittenish in size and substance. Thinking about that scared her into worrying that if the plethfura weren’t swept up, a lightning strike might bring these collections to life.”


Floofvine (catfinition) – of or related to a feline deity; supremely catlike.

In use: “With carefully created ears and a long, floofy tail that twitched back and forth, her orange and white Halloween costume was floofvine.”

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