Apfloofrition (floofinition) – A rare or unusual appearance of an animal.
In Use: “People enjoy sharing photos and videos on Flooftube of apfloofritions, particularly cats showing up in their house, when they don’t own a cat!”
Floofbit (2)
Floofbit (floofinition) – An animal who seems to have a job to make people get up and move around. Origins: 2007, Ohio, United States, Facebook
In Use: “When her son suggested that Karla needed a Fitbit to remind her to move, she pointed to her young dogs and replied, ‘Don’t worry, I got Crockett and Tubbs to keep me moving.’ As if that was a cue, Tubbs sprang up and started barking and racing around, which naturally drew Crockett into the vortex, and made Karla get up and go to the back door, yelling, ‘You two take that into the backyard.'”
Tacifloof
Tacifloof (floofinition) – An animal who is mostly silent. Origins, Floofish, circa 1734, Flooflund.
In Use: “Yolanda’s big Maine tacifloof let out an angry tiger’s growl in the backyard, bringing her out in time to watch Kosmo chase a big black bear out of the yard.”
Floofichor
Floofichor (floofinition) – Smells carried by or discharged by animals which triggers memories in others. Origins: ancient middle Floofish, first mentioned in Tales of a Traveling Floof, thirteenth century.
In Use: “Charlemagne pranced into the house’s mudroom from the rain, and with a shake of his thick wet fur, released floofichor which brought smiles to Pamela as memories of Huskies from her past trotted into her mind.”
Nonfloofpete Agreement
Nonfloofpete Agreement (floofinition) Agreement between animals not to fight and to cooperate when socializing or interacting with humans. Origins: 18th Century Floofgress Instruments for Successful Living Among Humans (ISLAH).
In Use: “Humans don’t know about nonfloofpete agreements and are suprised when the cats and dogs and other creatures sleep and play together, sharing food, treats, and lap time.”
Floofsumptive
Floofsumptive (floofinition) – 1. Descriptor for an animal’s approach who assumes they are the apex resident in a household. First noted use circa 1970, New York, USA.
In Use: “Closed doors impinged Queen Champ’s floofsumptive foundation that something must be happening on the other side. This was her empire and announced her displeasure with loud caterwauling and scratching.”
2. An animal which takes for granted that they are authorized to go anywhere, do anything, and eat everything. Origins: 1740 colonial America.
In Use: “As soon as food was set down, Sheldon made a presumptive claim with his chompers, no matter the food group.”
3. A belief that animal’s movements, activities, or behavior is expected and predictable. Origins: AOL, late 1990s.
In Use: “Following a floofsumptive bias, Kelly expected Hannibal to trot out and greet her, but the little pup was nowhere in sight, inducing floofxiety in her that something had happened to him.”
Floofdant
Floofdant (floofinition) – 1. Person who is always telling stories or sharing facts about animals.
In Use: “A foster mother for kittens, puppies, birds — just ’bout any critter except humans — Jen could easily be drawn into being a floofdant via a question like, ‘How are you animals doing?'”
2. An animal who insists on doing things the same way every time, not moving until the matter is corrected.
In Use: “Queen Precious was a floofdant who demanded her food bowl be positioned just so, along with her bed, insisting that everyone go to the bed at the same time every night, becoming annoyed and vocal if this wasn’t observed.”
Michael Seidel, writer 