Floofpas (floofinition) – an embarrassing act a housepet does in a social situation.
In use: “In a classic floofpas, as her friend reached her, her dog went forward and tried humping her friend’s leg.”
Floofburger
Floofburger (floofinition) human food prepared for and served to housepets; (slang) an affectionate term for a pet who begs for or steals human food.
In use: “When he grilled his chicken kebabs, he always planned a floofburger, grilling a special kebab for the cats. They started begging for it as soon as it hit the grill.”
Flooforous
Flooforous (floofintion) – a pleasant sound made by a housepet.
In use: “Daisy’s flooforous barking announced how happy the golden retriever was to see him.”
Mewincholy
Mewincholy (floofinition) – a housecat’s sound of pensive sadness, often with no discernible cause.
In use: “Sitting in the living room, not far from him as he read his book, his cat released a a deep mewincholy, breaking his focus. “What is it?” he asked, staring at his fur friend. In response, she turned to him and unleashed a softer rendition of the same sound.”
Floofclectic
Floofclectic (floofinition) – a housepet with unusual markings.
In use: “He called her Heinz because the sweet, floofclectic feline appeared, in his words, to be half-Siamese, half-Maine Coon, with a black short-hair tabby tail, some calico and European blotched tabby markings in her hips, and big ginger paws. Her eyes were almond-shaped sapphires, her meow was a strident grunt, and her purr was a drowning gurgle, but, damn, she was smart.”
Floofception
Floofception (floofinition) – the act of deceiving a housepet; the act of causing a housepet to accept as true or valid what is false or invalid.
In use: “Floofception is offered required when dealing with houspets. For example, to draw his cats out of hiding, David often shook the kibble box, leading the cats to believe they were about to be fed.”
Lafloofchezia
Lafloofchezia (floofinition) – The use of vulgar or foul language with a housepet to relieve stress or pain.
In use: “The cat was sprawled on its back on the floor, its silky belly exposed to the sun. Naturally, Cheryl thought it was safe to give the cat a tummy rub. A split second later, the cat had scratched her arm and hand, and she was sitting back, delivering lafloofchezia.”
Purrveyor
Purrveyor (catfinition) – a cat who will purr as soon as they see their human companion(s).
In use: “From the very beginning of her time with them, the tiny rescued tabby was a purrveyor, purring loudly as she ran to them to greet them.”
Conflooferacy
Conflooferacy (floofinition) – a league or alliance between housepets for some purpose.
In use: “Recognizing one another’s skill sets and how they could help one another, the cats and dogs established a conflooferacy. For example, a cat could jump up, hang from the door handle and turn it while a dog pushed the door open, allowing them all to escape as the bird stood lookout and called out warnings.”
Obfloofurate
Obfloofurate (floofinition) – a housepet who is stubbornly persistent in wrongdoing.
In use: “Although he moved the doughnuts and sprayed Crystal with water to dissuade her, the little Bombay Black with golden eyes and velvet fur was an obfloofurate miscreant, constantly stealing and eating his mini powdered-sugar doughnuts.”
Michael Seidel, writer 