Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floofcebo (floofinition) – the psychological lift provided from the company of animals.
In use: “Girlfriend gone, fired from his job, and now it was raining. Suicidal thoughts were entertained, but his dog trotted over, sat down against his leg, and smiled up at him, tongue hanging from his mouth. The floofcebo effect brought an immediate grin. After a few moments of rubbing his dog’s head and scratching his ears, he got up, made coffee, and began making plans to find a better job.”
Floofdango (floofinition) – a foolish or useless act done by a housepet.
In use: “Among the dog’s many floofdangos was his willingness to charge the screen patio door and crash through it. They never knew the reasons behind the behavior, which is what made it a floofdango.”
Floofberg (floofinition) – housepet who appears smaller than they are.
In use: “Whenever the puppy slept, he curled himself into a tight ball, and appeared to be about three feet across. That was resolved as the tip of the floofberg, for when he stood and unstretched his long limbs, he was a giant with enormous paws. Everyone agreed, he was going to be huge.”
Floofpectation (floofinition) – a housepet’s strong belief that something will happen; an attempt, through behavior or sounds, to make something happen.
In use: “He had a sandwich. The animals crowded around with floofpectations. In exasperation, he said, “This is banana and peanut butter guys. You won’t like it.” But with floofpectations remaining high, the cats started purring and meowing and the dog emitted a little, “Woof”. Sighing, he held the sandwich out for their inspection.”
Flooftonism (floofinition) – the philosophy of housepets, especially insofar as it addresses an absolute and eternal reality that revolves around being well-fed, napping, and having fun.
In use: “Although flooftonism doesn’t call for exclusion of others, Flash the cat* believes that other animals’ presence affects her pursuit of Floofvana.”
*With apologies to nan and Flash the cat.
Superfloofsition (floofinition) – in housepet quantum principles, the theory, practice, and observations that a housepet seems to be in two places at once.
In use: “She left Penny downstairs asleep in a sunlit living-room corner, but when she turned from opening her drawer to select her clothes, the little calico was sitting on the bed, watching her with luminous green eyes as its tail-tip tapped out a slow, amused beat.”
Hitchfloof (floofinition) – housepet’s mode of traveling by soliciting rides.
In use: “Beginning when he was a three pound puppy recovering from his horrid early life, the husky started hitchfloofing. Whenever they got up in the morning, the dog would jump up and go to one of them. Standing up on his hind legs with his front legs reaching up for them, he demanded to be carried around the house for a few minutes. Now that they were fifty years old and he was fifty-five pounds, it was harder to accommodate him.
“But they did.”
Floofturesque (floofinition) – visually attractive housepets.
In use: “As if aware that she was floofturesque, the cat let her tail drape over the wall and struck a demure but charming pose.”
Floofbilant (floofinition) – adjective that reflects housepet’s jubilant expressions or feelings.
In use: “Looking around, she noted her floofagerie’s floofbilant floofmosphere. Dogs’ tails were thumping like high revving engines, the bird was hopping from foot to foot, and above it all was the cats’ melody of thrumming purrs.”
Infloofsition (floofinition) – a severe questioning conducted by one or more housepets.
In use: “The floofizens gathered to conduct an infloofsition as soon as the bag was opened. When she set it down, the cats jumped up on chairs and tried reaching into it with their paws, while the big dog tried shoving his snout into the bag (earning a swat from a cat), and the little dog sniffed the air while jumping up and down, trying to see the bag.”
Michael Seidel, writer 