Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Exfloofsive (floofinition) – An area, period, or activity established or reserved for animal use.
In use: “She hadn’t planned it, but Caramel made every evening at eight PM his exfloofsive time, fetching his brush without being told, bringing it to her, and sitting down before her, waiting to be brushed, with his bright eyes telling her, “You know what you must do.” Resistance wasn’t even considered.”
Omnifloofium-gatherum (floofinition) – A gathering or collective of housepets. On small scales, they are generally organized around pools of sunlight or food being distributed. Organized omnifloofium-gatherums are established for more serious matters regarding quantum energy, shape-shifting, and time-shifting.
In use: “Each year, unbeknownst to humans, an omnifloofium-gatherum was established in which five representatives were sent to another dimension on a fact-finding adventure. Though it was an honor to be selected, the housepets felt bad for their humans, because they never knew what had happened to them.
“Then, along came a boy and a girl who changed everything.”
Floofcist (floofinition) – One who follows a floofcism, a doctrine that animals are less intelligent than humans, lack emotions, and don’t love or feel pain as humans do, and should therefore have less rights and freedoms.
In use: “Ted initially seemed like a great guy, but then revealed that he supported big game trophy hunting. Being floofcist was an immediate deal breaker for Heather, she told him. In response, he laughed at her shallow sentimentality.”
Spokesfloof (floofinition) 1. The outspoken pet that answers for the group when their people talk to them. 2. Persons, groups, or organizations that speak up on the behalf of animals to gain protections and rights.
In use: “Arriving home and seeing his menagerie, he always asked, “Who’s hungry?” Jade appointed herself as spokesfloof to reply, “Meee,” but the rest generally agreed with her after a few seconds.”
Floof Apparent (floofinition) – A housepet whose claim cannot be set aside by the birth or arrival of another housepet.
In use: “Though the kitten was gorgeous, Francis the dog knew that he was the floof apparent, and showed he was unconcerned by taking the kitten under his paw and helping her learn how the house worked.”
Floofwork (floofinition) – Specific tasks at home related to having housepets, such as cleaning litter boxes and brushing animals’ fur coats.
In use: “Leaving the bedroom for the kitchen, she paused five times along the way to pick up clumps of fur. Five times. She was incredulous. She’d just picked up fur when she’d gone into the bedroom not three minutes ago. Floofwork never ended.”
NIMB (Floofintion) – Acronym that means Not In My Bed, employed by housepets to register their disdain for anyone/thing disrupting their slumber.
In use: “Raising her head, she issued a plaintive NIMB growl when another animal jumped onto the bed. The other immediately fled.”
Floofcession (floofinition) – A number animals moving forward in an orderly fashion, especially as part of a ceremony, following mom, or going to eat.
In use: “When the can-opener began turning, a floofcession came through the door and settled at her feet.”
Unifloof (floofinition) – Animals who hang around colleges and universitites.
In use: “Unifloofs were abundant, with unideer bringing their unifawns to mingle with the students, to unisquirrels racing across the campus and up trees, and, most popular with the students, unicats soaking in sunshine and knowledge while spying on the students to see what they were learning.”
Eflooftome (floofinition) – A housepet who is appears or acts like the perfect example of their species.
In use: “Lanky, with shades of lustrous gold in his coat, and twenty-four inches tall at his withers, Meyer sat in the doorway, the eflooftome of Golden Retrievers.”
Michael Seidel, writer 