Science fiction, fantasy, mystery and what-not
Floofceny (floofinition) – a housepet’s unlawful taking of personal property with intent to deprive the rightful owner of it permanently.
In use: “When Aspacia began her day, she discovered evidence of floofceny. A floofen had stolen her checkbook and torn out all the checks during the night.”
h/t to Aspacia S. Bissass
Delefloof (floofinition) – a housepet sent or authorized to represent other housepets. See also: delecat, deledog, delebird.
In use: “No matter what time he arrived home, exactly one delefloof met him at the door, like they’d been standing sentry inside it. Of course, after being home for one to three minutes — just enough time for the delefloof to activate the floof notification network (F.N.N.), the other floofs appeared, wanting attention and, of course, food.”
Floofdom (floofinition) – a couch, sofa, floor, chair, bed, pillow, rug, carpet, yard, or other space guarded or protected by a housepet.
In use: “The tom and the queen squared off over the floofdom, defined by a square of sunshine on the floor. Although the tom was twice her size and was there first, the queen had an attitude and won the skirmish.”
Floofen (floofinition) – a housepet who commit crimes, often involving food, toys, or escaping.
In use: “The floofens worked together as a team. The dog distracted the people while the cat pulled food off the table. Both shared the spoils. Pizza was their favorite. Pizza was never safe from the floofens.”
Metafloofics (floofinition) – discipline of floofosophy concerned with household pets’ fundamental grasp of reality, or what reality they might be living in.
In use: “The question before the hypothetical household court was one of metafloofics. They’d debated before whether the dogs and cats adhered to the same principles or reality and existence. Mark had a strong feeling that the cats did not, and he was starting to believe they were influencing the dogs.
“That, frankly, disturbed him.”
Wanderfloof (floofinition) – a housepet with a penchant for wandering.
In use: “Although she’d been his cat for six years, the pet door let her roam as she wanted. As he held the wanderfloof one day, a neighbor expressed surprise, because she’d been feeding and taking care of the cat for the last several years. She’d always wondered where the cat went when it disappeared for hours.”
Flooftentious (floofinition) – a pet’s behavior characterized by assumption of dignity after something silly or an event that casts them in a bad image has taken place.
In use: “When falling to make a jump as planned, cats’ flooftentious reaction will be to sit and groom their face, or to look around with an expression that states, “What? I meant to do that.””
Floofdigenous (floofinition) – particular places where we normally or naturally find our pets in our homes.
In use: “In many homes, sofas, couches, beds, or patches of sunlight are floofdigenous to our cats and dogs.”
I had multiple dreams last night. Most remain in pieces in my mind like debris after a storm. The essences:
Not much further information is available on the murder dream. Awakening and thinking about it, I attribute it more to my writing muses than an intention to kill another person. I’m always thinking about escaping, surviving, killing, investigating, flying, traveling, exploring, and robbing places. They’re exercises for my imagination, IMO.
The cat dream was a simple anxiety dream. Quinn hasn’t been well. His breathing bothered us. We’d endured a summer of wildfire smoke and hazardous air, so I put his breathing problems down to that. We’d been keeping him inside and addressing his breathing issues. When he didn’t improve after the air improved, I thought I’d take him in for an antibiotic shot.
But the vet found a lump on Quinn’s neck, so we’re going through the challenge of treating him, keeping him hydrated, and feeding him. We’re not certain of his issue, yet. Never a large cat, he dropped two pounds and now weighs just five. He’s mostly perky, though, but not eating and drinking enough on his own. I take comfort and hope in signs like him rubbing up against me, jumping on my lap, stretching, trying to claw furniture, and yawning.
Meanwhile, I’m going through the process of letting him go. I’ve endured this with other pets, so I understand some of the emotional, physical, and intellectual dynamics. It’s always different, of course, and it’s never easy.
I enjoyed the game show dream. First, you’d press a button to start the big wheel spinning, and press the button again to stop it. The big wheel had activities and numbers. If it landed on the activity, you did it. Doing the activity, such as twenty push-ups, authorized you to rob a competitor by taking a token or moving them back by a spin on the punishing wheel.
If the big wheel landed on a number, that was the number of spaces you’d move. Climbing, crawling, jumping, and swinging on ropes were required to move along squares. After moving forward and stopping on a square, you were asked a question. Fall to answer it correctly — it was timed, but you had three chances — meant you faced the punishment wheel.
Come to think of it, there was a television audience cheering us on. Writing about it today prompts comparisons to an updated game of Life combined with Trival Pursuit, which sums up my writing life, I think.
Spinning wheels, killing time, chasing trivia, and hoping to advance, it’s a writer’s life.
The music today comes via a personal experience. Trying to give my cat a pill, I kept saying, “Come on, give a little bit.” He never did but I managed to get the pill into him.
However, the diabolical little flooflaw then went under my desk and spit it out. When I retrieved it, I discovered three more pills.
Grrr.
I crunched the pill up and put it into a little dab of water and administered it to him via an eye-dropper.
So, in honor of Quinn, here’s a past hit streaming through my awareness, Supertramp with “Give A Little Bit” from 1977.
Michael Seidel, writer 