Stillness, sunshine, stretch
A tail flicks, an ear twitches
A paw shifts, stillness
Floofmiliar
Floofmiliar (floofinition) – 1. A housepet who is a close friend or associate to the people living in the house. 2 Housepets who are friends with one another. 3. A demon in the form of a housepet supposedly attending and obeying a witch.
In use: “Her miniature Collies were more than pets or friends, especially Gin-gin. Gin-gin was her floofmiliar, attending every mood and acting as a confidant. Gin-gin was trustworthy and dependable, and never told anyone the secrets that she knew.”
Inflooftrate
Inflooftrate (floofinition) – an animals’ gradual, surreptitious access or entrance to gain trust or to take over a household or person.
In use: “He had no pets but he’d left a window open and a young cat had inflooftrated his house, sleeping in his favorite chair. When the cat saw him, he stood, stretched, jumped off the chair and ran over like he was greeting an old friend.”
First Floof
First Floof (floofinition) – informal or ceremonial title given to the housepet which has preferential standing.
In use: “She’d always had cats. Daisy came to her when her son went to war and never returned. Showing remarkable intelligence — for a dog, in her opinion — Daisy quietly became her loyal First Floof and was by her side when she went to sleep and didn’t wake up, staying there until the police came on a welfare check.”
Floofbadour
Floofbadour (floofinition) – 1. An animal, particularly a housepet, who likes to sing by howling, barking, meowing, chirping, etc; 2. A person who likes to sing to animals.
In use: “Whenever he played his favorite album, They Only Come Out At Night by the Edgar Winter Group, his cat, who is apparently a floofbadour, runs in from wherever he is and begins loudly purring and meowing.”
Floofpious
Floofpious (floofinition) – 1. An abundance of housepets; 2. Someone religiously devoted to animals, particularly housepets.
In use: “Her floofpious existence ended up with a house featuring several catios with cat trees and shelters, along with kennels with dog houses, and bird cages. No animal was ever turned away, although some of them were only with her until she found it a home more suited for its situation.”
Haifloof #20
Tummy being rubbed
Unleashes a primal urge
The hand is attacked
Machfloofnations
Machfloofnations (floofinition) – 1. A housepet’s scheming or crafty action or artful design intended to accomplish some end; 2. People’s scheming or crafty action to deal with a housepet.
In use: “Every time Bo saw Papi leave through the pet door, the big black cat would run over and lie down in front of it so Papi couldn’t return, part of the machfloofnations Bo employed to keep the little ginger out of the house.”
Haifloof #17
Warning the squirrels
Fantasizing about birds
A day as a floof
Flooflist
Flooflist (floofinition) – 1. shopping list for items required to buy for housepets. 2. A list, record, index, or advertisement of animals available for fostering, rescue, lost, or found.
In use: “Each day, she perused flooflists from regional shelters, searching for her lost dog, but had no luck. However, she fell in love with one mature, unwanted dog and decided that she would adopt him. The day after he moved in, her lost dog, Esmerelda, returned.”
Michael Seidel, writer 