Tag: Cat

Monday’s Theme Music

I awoke in the early hours with a cat tapping at the pet door and a dream lingering in my head. After peeing (my bladder said, “Well, since you’re awake,”) and drinking some water (because I’d just peed, obviously, right?), I returned to bed (after letting the cat back in because it was cold outside). In the moments before falling asleep, I thought about the dream I’d left. In that time, too, my brain started singing, “When you close your eyes and go to sleep, everything about you is a mystery.”

It took a few moments of sleep-fogged thinking to identify it as The Romantics song, “Talking in your Sleep”. I thought it was released sometime in the early 1980s, which led me on a mental chase of other facts from that era to pin it down. (Like, where was I living when I heard that song? Okinawa?)

I looked it up this morning because I needed to know (1983). So, that’s the music for today.

Stay positive, test negative, and wear a mask. Cheers

The Romantics – Talking in Your Sleep – YouTube

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A Lost Cat & Planting Trees Dreams

The first dream found me in a hotel. My wife was with me in one of those sprawling single-story hotels, where we had a suite. We were watching a friend’s cat for him while he was away. Gray and white, the cat’s name was Naruba. It was a friendly and relaxed animal. He wanted out of the room. I let him out. He disappeared from sight.

Now I was worried; I had to find him. I searched and searched but it was fruitless. By the time my friend returned, I’d given up. But, just as I was about to confess that his cat was gone, the cat reappeared. My friend saw him first. While I was relieved the cat was there, I didn’t think it was the same cat. This one seemed much younger than his cat. My buddy was happy, though, so I let it go.

In the next dream, I was with a few other friends. We were up in the hills off the side of a narrow road. I wasn’t certain what was going on. One friend was looking for something. After a bit of conversation, I realized that he was looking for land. I thought he wanted to buy some land.

We found a place. I recommended it to him. He agreed that it was a good place. Then, though, he brought out a box of plants and planted a tree. He explained that he’d been planting trees for years, wherever he could. I was impressed, and thought, I should do that, too. It was so clever of him.

That’s where it ended.

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Floofnostic

Floofnostic (floofinition) – An animal who doesn’t believe or disbelieve what a person said, but remains doubtful and ambivalent about it.

In use: “The cat and dog each were floofnostic when their human said, “It’s cold and wet outside. You won’t like it.” They each insisted on going out, but then immediately wanted back in.”

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Better than Floof

Better than Floof (floofinition) – Floof Orleans-based floofsical group formed in 1988. The four original members were all Loufloofsia State University attendees when they formed the band.

In use: “Better than Floof major song was their first hit, “Good”, which was featured in the film, The Floof-Sitters Club.

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The Swat

I’m on my knees, typing at my desk.

The cat is asleep on my chair.

It wasn’t so planned. I’d been typing when I raised my coffee cup to my lips and discovered it empty and dry.

No coffee.

But I had plans, and they included coffee.

Damnation.

I got up and went into the coffee to make more. When I returned, the cat had taken my chair. Curled up, he looked asleep.

Could that be right? I’d been gone two minutes. He’d taken over the chair and gone to sleep in two minutes? Yes, I was suspicious.

He’s done this before, so I know the routine. I moved the chair out of my way (the cat didn’t move anything during this — not a whisker, not an ear, not even a tail twitch), dropped to my knees, and resumed my activities.

When at last I was did, I stood and stretched. Now I needed water. Turning sideways, I slipped past the sleeping cat on the chair, my back to him.

That’s when I farted.

It wasn’t anything dramatic, just a loud burping noise.

That’s when the cat swatted me.

I stared down at him. “Did you just swat me?”

He was looking up at me. I swear that he looked defiant. I thought, he’s been planning this. He’s been thinking, I’ve had enough. The next time that he farts in front of me, I’m going to swat him.

I glared at him. “I don’t fart that often.”

Rearranging his paws, he lowered his head and closed his eyes.

I think he looked smug.

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Cognofloof

Cognofloof (floofinition) – Additional personal name given to a housepet or animal.

In use: “Although the terrier’s formal name was Sir Jack Black (because he was a Jack Russell and his rescuer’s daughter was a Jack Black fan), his cognofloofs included Jackie, Missile (often shortened, itself, to Miss, or Mizz) for his proclivity to bolt across a yard or room, and Thumper, for his furiously wagging tail.”

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Floofseat

Floofseat (floofinition) – The most enviable position, location, or opportunity for an animal.

In use: “Every home with pets ends up with a floofseat, where at least one animal is sure to be sitting or sleeping.”

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Murray Floof

Murray Floof (floofinition) – Flooflish actor and floof rock (flock) singer from Floofdon, Floofland. His younger brother is Anthony Floof, who is known for his role as Floofpert Giles in Floofy the Vampire Slayer.

In use: “Murray Floof is probably best known for a pair of international hits, “Superfloof” and “One Night in Floofkok”, which charted well in several countries.”

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Floofscription

Floofscription (floofinition) – Words inscribed to describe an animal, particularly a pet or floof friend.

In use: “After his first pet passed away, he wrote a floofscription to explain how much the animal meant to him, and then decided from then on he’d write floofscriptions for his pets while they were alive, when he could celebrate them with them. That was the beginning of his private New Year’s Day routine.”

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Bag It

Tucker Carlson has a problem with disappearing papers. From NY Mag Intelligencer:

On Wednesday night’s show, Tucker Carlson reported that his team had acquired incriminating documents. However, they sent them from Washington to Los Angeles, and the documents disappeared. And they neglected to make any copies. So now the only copy of the documents that would nail the probable next president of the United States are gone:

Few believe poor Tucker. He’s being mocked to hell and back.

I understand, though. I’ve been there.

I was taking university classes with the University of Maryland (go, Terps!) around my schedule when I was stationed with the Air Force at Kadena Air Base, Okinawa, Japan, back in the eighties. My wife and I lived with two cats in a tiny place off base outside of one of the gates.

Finishing a paper, I put it on the bookcase by the door so it’d be there when I departed and I was less likely to forget it. This was pre-computer days. I’d pounded out the paper on my used government IBM Selectric II typewriter. Our cat, Jade, jumped up on the bookcase and puked on the paper. Gross as was, there was no way I could turn that in. I thought about bagging it for evidence but laughed that off.

Abashed, I reported what happened to my professor and asked for another day. Dismayed, he said, “Well, I’ve heard that before, or variations, but I never expected to hear it from you. Well, okay, I’ll give it a day.” It really pissed me off that he clearly didn’t believe me, but he gave me the day.

Next time, I’ll bag it and turn it in.

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