Tag: assisted living

Wednesday’s Theme Music

Ashland, Oregon — Wednesday, April 8, 2026.

54 F, clouds are parading across our valley’s blue sky. Forecasters tell us we have a high of 75 F and thunderstorms expected this afternoon.

Relief and tension feed my morning. Mom went to her PCP yesterday for blood in her urine. “What transpired of that?” I asked.

“Nothing,” is the answer.

I don’t know what nothing means in this context because it can mean so much.

Mom’s outing yesterday was a bit chaotic. They arrived at the doctor’s office only to be told that Mom had cancelled the appointment. Mom replied, “I thought it was a video appointment.”

That triggers an abundance of questions, like, hey Mom, where do you think sis was taking you? Why did you ask for a specific outfit to wear to the doctor?

Sis managed to talk the office into seeing Mom anyway. The doctor talked to Mom at length about living in the assisted living center vs living at home with the physician telling Mom, “You need 24 hours asistsance.” Mom was adamant; don’t want to live there. Can’t afford it. “Sell your house.” No!

Around and around and around it goes.

Likewise, there’s relief that a cease-fire was called in Iran. Just two weeks, leaving open the questions, will it be honored and what happens after that?

Not a surprise at all but both Iran and the United States claimed victory.

Oil prices plunged. Markets surged. Neither of those are a surprise, either. Reminders proliferate among economists and pundits, the price of gas won’t drop quickly because it’ll take time to restore the supply chain and start facilities that were sidelined.

We filled our gas tank yesterday. What amazed us was the vehicle ahead. He took eight minutes to fill his truck. What is going on, we wondered. And how much is his gas? Turned out, he filled a 31-gallon tank, which is over twice our tank’s size: $192. This was at Costco, which offers the lowest gas price locally.

I joked, it probably took so long to fill because he had to call for a loan.

Back to Trump, I wondered what he learned from this episode. He had been talking about using the military in other places. Hope that he pulls back from that.

Then I check the news: Iran is stopping traffic from going through the Strait of Hormuz because Israel attacked Hezbollah in Lebanon.

Not surprising but I ended up thinking about storms and shelter. The Neurons fed “Gimme Shelter” into the morning mental music stream. The song features some relevant lyrics.

Ooh, a storm is threatening
My very life today
If I don’t get some shelter
Ooh yeah I’m gonna fade away

War, children
It’s just a shot away
It’s just a shot away
War, children
It’s just a shot away
It’s just a shot away

The Rolling Stones came out with this rock classic way back in 1969. I enjoyed this version with Lady Gaga visiting to add vocals. She delivers. Her shoes, though…amazing how she moves on them. Wow.

Hope peace and grace shelter you from the storms.

Cheers

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Tuesday’s Theme Music – Hang On

Ashland, Oregon — Tuesday, April 7, 2026.

54 F right now under light clouds skirmishing with blue skies, we’re anticipating a high of 75 F.

It’s a whirlwind morning. Sis is picking up her car from its body shop repairs AND taking Mom to the doctors at the same time. It’s a high-wire act.

Meanwhile, sis has been assisting Mom and is now suggesting maybe Mom should live alone, maybe with help from Visiting Angels.

More critically, Trump is escalating his rhetoric against Iran. After practically vanishing for a few days, he emerged to bless the people of Iran while threatening to kill them. So sane. So smart.

How seriously do we take Trump and this threat — and what can we do. His whole approach to the war he started with Iran has been one of his patented crazy weaves.

Mock Paper Scissors brought us the highlights about Trump and what he’s said about his war. “We’ve won, we’re close to winning, it’s over, close to over, here’s a deadline — and another — and another — and another.” It’s like dealing with a drunk relative when you’re trying to tell them it’s not safe for them to drive.

Trump is loving it in the spotlight. Judging from their silence, Republicans seem to like it as well. They’re saying, “Yes, threatening to destroy another nation, basically for existing. That’s exactly what we Christians voted for in 2024.”

What is interesting as well is that Trump was losing ground with Evangelicals — until he attacked Iran. Now he’s gaining ground with them again. I cringe to think how happy they would be if he actually nuked Iran.

What was that Trump said about no more wars? What was that about being a unifier and peace president?

What was that Trump said about lowering prices? That was before he decided to start bombing Iran, which raised prices for air travel, food, and anything related to gas and oil.

What was that Trump said about bombing Iran in 2025 and obliterating their nuclear program?

We still wait for the full release of the Epstein files, too. How many times has that been promised?

Today’s music came from the thought I had upon reading several Trump posts, “Something has you going tonight.” I thought that because his crazy level seemed to be higher. Was he hopped up on sugar or off some secret meds they’re given him, or enduring a UTI?

Eavesdropping on me, The Neurons pulled that line out of an April Wine song, “I Like to Rock”. That began playing in my morning mental music stream. Then I had to sit back and think, what is that song?

My mind refused to cooperate, holding my thinking for ransom until I gave them coffee and a chocolate biscotti. Then they finally identified the song and band.

Hope peace and grace come our way, and lands on Trump without getting blown out of the sky, and helps him see reason. Fingers crossed, right, that he doesn’t escalate us into WWIII.

Cheers

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Thursday’s Theme Music –

Ashland, Oregon — Thursday, April 2, 2026.

Cold morning with sunshine glinting off a wet ground. Thirty-five F. High will be about 55 F. Most trees remain bare branched. Blued white smoke boils out of planned fires in the mountains.

Friends were telling me last night that NOAA has put out a warning for Oregon rivers. Our extended snow-drought is going to cause water levels to drop on the rivers. That will really slice into the outdoor tourism industry in southern Oregon.

A friend passed away the other day. We just learned of it last night. 88, he’s been ill since I met him in 2007. A Republican and Trump supporter, he and I didn’t socialize much, and his illness kept him at home except for medical treatments for the last six years. Strange that he’s a Trumper, as he’s intelligent and compassionate. I never thought of him as racist, but he hated Affirmative Action. He called reverse discrimination. This was one of the many things we disagreed about. Still, his wife is a very nice person, and his son — a Republican — has worked hard with my friend to help the homeless. RIP, Bill.

Mom is quiet again, but she is applying for a senior living apartment. She’d have her own place and live by herself. I’m not enthralled with the idea, but she and my sisters like it. We’ll see what happens next.

Speaking of what happens, Trump gave a dud of a speech about the war with Iran he started. Meandering, he offered vague assertions about winning without clarification about what was won. He basically claims, ‘we’re safer now’ but doesn’t offer any facts to back that up. He also said that he might bomb Iran more. Why, if we’re safer now?

Today’s song comes from Todd Rundgren. “I Saw the Light” is in the morning mental music stream. I don’t know why. It doesn’t relate to anything from the dream side of things. Released in 1972, it was part of the radio rotation for a few years but never really spoke to me.

Hope your day is going well. May you flourish in the times to come.

Cheers


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Wednesday’s Theme Music – Why

Ashland, Oregon — Wednesday, April 1, 2026.

Rainy and 46, sunshine washes our house’s eastern side. Today’s high will be in the mid 50s and the low will drop to 32-35 F.

Mom and sis had a ‘good outing’ yesterday although in retrospect, my sister suspected Mom was trying to manipulate her. After the pharmacy run and Urgent care, Mom asked sis if they could drive by the house. Gina agreed but warned that they weren’t going in. Conversation ensued about how livable the house was but Gina told Mom that she didn’t think Mom could live there alone. Mom remarked that she needed some short-sleeved summer tops. Gina brushed it off but later thought that Mom was trying to get them into the house. We’re sure that if Mom had gotten in there, she would have refused to leave.

UTI was confirmed for Mom, along with blood in her urine. No word on further tests, yet.

I read good news yesterday on Diane Ravitch’s blog. A Federal judge ordered work on the Trump ballroom stopped. The judge questioned whether Trump had the authority to make the changes he was doing. Her second piece of reported good news from last week in that post, “A federal judge ruled on Tuesday that President Trump’s executive order barring the federal funding of NPR and PBS violated the First Amendment.”

Victories for We the People. We know that these decisions will be appealed to a higher court.

Over in the Supreme Court, we’re waiting to see if Trump’s executive order dicing up birthright citizenship and the 14th Amendment is judged legal. Trump attended the proceedings for a bit but left. I’m surprised he stayed awake.

Trump is giving a speech today about the Trump Iran War and about the US leaving NATO. He continues to send my WTF meter spinning with his consistent inconsistency. I suspect this is another ruse to distract from the Epstein files. The war is unpopular, though, and Trump’s approval ratings are showing it.

I also appreciated Paul Krugman’s post about the psychology of military incompetence and Pete Hegseth. I gleefully agree with Krugman: Hegseth is in over his head. Unfortunately, that doesn’t bode well for the safety of our nation or the lives of our people swearing to defend it.

I had a swarm of microdreams last night. When I sat and scribbled what I remembered, The Neurons played “I Got You” in the morning mental music stream. The Split Enz song was a 1980 hit. Reminds me a bit of the Cars. I’m not sure how it related to my thinking, though.

I hope the day goes well for you, no matter what you face or what the news brings.

Cheers

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Tuesday’s Theme Music – All Mixed Up

Ashland, Oregon — Tuesday, March 31, 2026.

March’s last day finds a dismal spring day in our valley. Rain, 49 F, high of 60 F, cloudy. Papi curls up and broods. I’m with him.

Mom reports blood in her urine and a UTI. She said she’s reported it to the staff, but nobody has seen her about it or given her antibiotics. Sis has volunteered to pick up Mom and take her to Urgent care.

Mom also said she is walking better, using her walker, and says she only fell once, when she was using the bathroom. She only uses her wheelchair when going to the bathroom.

My sisters are suddenly talking about Mom moving to an apartment. I can guess this is being pushed by finances. It’s not sustainable for Mom to stay in assisted living. Just costs too much.

I don’t see how moving her to an apartment is better than being on her own in her house. I’m sure Mom will argue that same point with my sister. My other sister had already said that Mom can’t live alone at home because of the mechanics of living: buying and preparing food, laundry, personal hygiene, cleaning. How will being in an apartment be any different?

I’m staying mute. Let them work it out for the moment. I’m weary of saying, “But, but, but — .” They want to follow this course, let it ride.

My wife addressed politics and world news this morning. “I can understand why people aren’t keeping up with the news. Trump started a war, kidnapped a president, talks about starting other wars, the ballroom. Then there’s all these other things going on. He’s having this named after himself or that. Prices are going through the roof. It’s all crazy and upsetting.”

Florida has chosen to rename an international airport after Trump. Trump showed drawings of a Miami skyscraper that’s said to be his library.

I think Florida should go all in, rename the state after him: Trumpistan. Why will become clear as extreme weather driven by climate change sinks and damages Florida. It’ll be the perfect symbol for misplaced lies, greed, and denial.

My wife laughed when she read the article about Trump’s library, saying, “Oh, honey, we’re gonna burn everything down that you ever touched.”

“Let It Ride” is in my morning mental music stream. The Neurons promoted it after I was thinking about trying — trying to do things, figure things out and understand, try to endure. That translated to try, try, try. Hearing that in my head, The Neurons added, “Would you let it ride.” So here we are.

Sis is giving updates that she has Mom at Urgent care. No drama yet, fingers crossed, knock on wood.

Cheers

4

Monday’s Theme Music – Dreams

Ashland, Oregon — Monday, March 30, 2026.

We’re looking at a rainy spring day in our valley. Sunshine is on the low side as clouds gather and darken. It’s 49 F with anticipation that we’ll peak in the low sixties today.

Out early to do our monthly Food & Friends delivery, we’re back now and into our daily grooves. Our F&F route was small again, with several favorite regulars missing. We always what’s happened to them and hope for the best.

I had a rush of micro-dreams last night. All of them felt very uplifting. Seeing and remembering them was like watching a strobe light on a crowd of dancers.

Mom remains quiet today but she’s on our minds as my sisters and I exchanged texts about her, remembering her, wondering what’s next. We spent a bit of time remembering Mom and Frank together. They used to love going dancing and to estate sales, or the grands’ concerts and ball games.

They were a sweet couple, but Mom’s illnesses, accidents, aging, and medications changed her.

Trump has also been on my Monday morning mind. I’ve been wondering, what’s next? Tariffs, ICE, Iran War, ballroom, Epstein files, general BS — what’s next?

Trump wants to start signing the currency. The GOP is proposing to issue a 250th Anniversary coin that will feature Trump’s pudgy scowl. Look others, I plan to Sharpie his signature if that comes to pass. I also agree with the premise that the only currency Trump’s face should grace is a wooden nickel or fake funny money.

Stevie Nicks wrote today’s song, “Dreams”. It was a hit for Fleetwood Mac and a personal favorite. Slow moving like a thunderstorm, it’s reflective words and sound carries me into different moods and thoughts. It’s also a song about loss, too, mourning what was and what is now. That’s no doubt why Les Neurons put it into the morning mental music stream.

I took to a different video for it, finding this lovely acoustic version on “Playing for Change”. I hope you enjoy it.

Let’s hope peace and grace arrive and help us all to improved lives.

Cheers

3

Sunday’s Theme Music –

Ashland, Oregon — Sunday, March 29, 2026.

49 F here this morning, we’ll looking for another day where the high temperature is in the low 70s. Yesterday ended with clouds mixing up with sunshine, and that’s where we’re starting today.

My wife and I were zonked out from attending the No Kings protests. Standing there, holding letters spelling out “No War”, blasted by sunshine, car exhaust, and noise, just undone us. We ate at Ruby’s Grill, a local favorite afterwards, and then did some errands. Back home, I read myself into a thirty-minute nap.

Still, it lifted our spirits to be among so many protesting Trump and his policies. I was pleased by how many young people participated this time. The responses from motorists going by also pleased me, especially when I say cars full of young children go by, the driver honking their horns while the children waved, gave thumbs up, or flashed peace signs.

Seems like ICE isn’t popular. Nor is the Trump Iran War. Nor is Trump’s grifting, tariffs, lies, and pardons, or his connections to Epstein.

My sisters and I received a good Mom report today. Karin — daughter of Mom’s late partner, Frank — visited Mom yesterday. She reported that Mom was happy and healthy. Using her walker, Mom showed Karin around the assisted living facility, pointing out her friends and their names. Mom said she could live alone at home except she struggles to get out of bed.

My sisters and I pointed out to one another that Mom is doing well because she’s more active. Part of that is her vanity: other women are using their walkers there, so Mom will, too. She doesn’t want to be known as the ‘old woman in the wheelchair’.

Mom is also eating better there, and probably sleeping better. Her desire to be home stems from her fixation on finances: she has a home that she owns and doesn’t want to be paying a small fortune for a place to lay her head. Mom also knows her finances will only go so far — and then what?

Yes, it’s an aging riddle wrapped up in a social enigma. We’re happy that Mom is reported to be doing well.

Today’s morning mental music stream inhabitant is “Only A Fool Would Say That”. This is a 1972 Steely Dan tune. It came to mind yesterday during the No Kings protest in Medford. A young white woman stopped at a traffic light rolled her window down and shouted “God bless Trump” five times.

People around me laughed and said, “What a fool.” The Neurons picked it up and rushed to the music memory module to find the Steely Dan song.

I hope your Sunday proceeds with grace and peace.

Cheers

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Friday’s Theme Music – Domination

Ashland, Oregon — Friday, March 27, 2026.

39 F and the heater is on. Blue skies and sunshine dominate, and we’re expected to reach the mid to upper 70s today.

Mom dominated thoughts and energy yesterday, and this morning, so far. My sisters began texting about three hours ago and are still going at it. There’s a lot of dark humor in today’s text, though. Mom once told one of her husbands that if they made a television show of our family, it would be “Combat!” A sister replied, “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest”. Yes, I answered, and there’s our issue: Mom sees one thing and we see another.

Gina took supplies to Mom this morning but didn’t talk with her. Gina reports that she thought she saw a staff member spotted her entering the building and hurried away.

I’m fuming over Trump news. First, he voted by mail in Florida’s elections, which is something he’s trying to do away with. It just leaves me incredulous. But when asked about it, he said, “I’m president.”

Bingo. That is his response to everything. He sees a different standard for himself, and by extension, his people. Voting by mail, okay for him — bad for everyone else.

He exercises an infuriating double standard. With the GOP’s help, and SCOTUS, he’s made a mockery of the office and what it’s supposed to be, a servant of the people. He clearly sees it the other way, as is evident by his behavior and policies.

Now he’s putting his signature on the money, adding to where his name shows up in the nation. It’s all about him.

We see it, too, in the war with Iran. “They gave me a very nice gift”. The gift was letting supposedly Iran letting tankers through the Strait of Hormuz.

Not a gift to him, except in his ego-crazed mind.

And he’ll end the war “when he feels it in his bones”. Not about the war and its objectives, the nation, or even Iran; it’s about him.

Oddly, The Neurons provided me with a song that goes in a different direction in the morning mental music stream. Although I recall several dreams — one involving collecting diamonds and another about traveling and eating pie — I have George Harrison singing “What Is Life”. My subconscious might be feeding off those opening lines, “What I feel, I can’t say.”

I can’t say. *smile*

May your day progress with peace, grace, and happiness. See you at the protests tomorrow, Saturday, March 28, 2026.

Cheers

4

The Mom Exchanges

Mom, 90, suffering from several medical conditions, in on many medications. My sisters, Gina, Lisa, and Sharon, live not far away from Mom. An intelligent person and retired nurse, Mom moved into assisted living this year after a suicide threat which she denies.

Before that, she lived with her partner, Frank, in her own home. That changed when Frank died last October.

Gina took Mom in and gave Mom a room with a bathroom. Mom was initially happy but slowly professed that she hated it and wanted to leave and go back to her house. She then began accusing her son-in-law, Pat, of ‘using a device on her head to hurt her’, spying on her, and hiding her TV control.

Pat denies it all. Pat and Mom had a great relationship until five months ago, when Mom’s accusations began. Last September, he converted her back porch into a room so she could live in her house on one level. After Frank died, Pat set up the room for Mom in his house.

Mom has a consistent pattern of accusing others of being mean and hateful to her. She did that with Frank. I never witnessed Frank being like that.

When Mom moved in with Gina, Mom began accusing her of being mean and hateful. I visited for a while and never witnessed Gina being mean and hateful. Those traits are completely contrary to Gina’s personality.

I called to chat with Mom last September. She launched into a diatribe about Frank being mean to her. I said, “Mom, I’m not listening to this. We’ll talk later.” I waited for her to respond. She said, “Okay.” We said good-bye.

Mom reported to Gina that that I’d been mean and hateful and had hung up on her.

Mom told us that Lori is being mean and hateful to her.

Lori at the assisted living facility told us that Mom has given a notice to vacate. Mom told them she plans to return to her home.

Mom’s physical therapist, Jennifer, visited Mom this week. Mom claims that Jennifer witnessed Lori being mean and hateful.

Gina called Jennifer. Jennifer said she witnessed a heated exchange between Mom and Lori. She also reported that Mom is thriving there. She’s using a walker instead of a wheelchair, socializing, and eating well.

Mom told Jennifer that the conversation she was having with Lori was about moving out. Mom insists she’s moving back to her house. Jennifer related to Gina that she told Mom, “I don’t recommend that you leave here or go back home. You’re doing well here but you’re not capable of living on your own.”

I texted Mom today:

“Hey Mom, heard your plans to leave the facility in April. I want to understand your plan so I can stay in the loop. Where are you planning to go and have you talked to anyone about helping you move?”

Mom responded:

“I’m going to my house where I don’t have to pay 5500 a month and be screamed at by this boss. I’m having diarrhea today and last night. I finally got two Imodium‘s but I only have one big pad left many small ones Jennifer, my physical therapist stopped to see me on Tuesday and heard LORI screaming at me about medicine from Sam’s. She said oh, Dee this is too stressful for you. I said I know I’m paying her a fortune to be screamed at. I have asked Lisa when she brings me pads if she ever does to take me home no answer. I’ll probably have to pay Uber. I have to be out by April 18. I’m very surprised to hear from you.”

I replied:

“Thanks for explaining, Mom. I understand you want to go back home. Who is confirmed to help you get there with your things, and what day are you planning to leave?”

She answered:

“No one is confirmed to help me get there with my things. Gina and Sharon don’t speak to me and Lisa doesn’t answer me. All my friends are dead. Ever since Frank died how my children have turned against me, even though I went to the hospital in Gina was proving wrong. The night. I went to the hospital Pat said to me I need to talk to you. I was crying so hard. I said Pat all you have to do is say three words it’s all true and he did not do it so I lost my whole family.”

My sisters, Gina and Lisa, were with Mom when she went to the hospital. Pat was not. Gina and Lisa deny that Mom’s conversation and crying took place.

And that’s where we now stand.

4

Thursday’s Theme Music — Trouble

Ashland, Oregon — Thursday, March 26, 2026.

It’s 35 degrees out with disorganized traces of thin fog and a bright blue sky. Today’s highs will carry the mercury into the sixties.

We have gnat trouble in our house. We’ve been slowly noticing the little critters. From what I’ve read, they may have started around the houseplants but have moved to the bathroom. My wife takes hot Epson salt baths and the skylight has a new ‘white film’ and a spider web up there is littered with gnat bodies. Now we need to address stopping these from spreading.

Adding to today’s troubles, my sisters are anxious about what’s going on with Mom. They’ve asked me to contact her about her plans. I was asked because I haven’t been publicly denounced as mean and hateful. My plan is just to ask her what her plans are and not to otherwise engage. I’m doing this by text as Mom has developed a confrontational communication style in the last year.

Mom’s activities are driving my sisters’ anxiety. Mom gave notice to the assisted living facility that she is moving out in April. She also informed them that she had contacted an elder abuse lawyer. She then changed all her prescriptions from the assisted living facility pharmacy back to Sam’s Club, where she used to get them.

It seems like Mom’s intention is to return to her house. That’s what she keeps saying she wants to do. But since she moved out last year, all the food has been removed, along with most of her belongings. The home was being readied for a sale in the spring, with Mom’s agreement. Everything now is topsy turvy.

My fingers are crossed that something useful will emerge from this attempt. I am not out to argue with her plans or try to make her see reason or anything. Just trying to see what she thinks is going on.

Political issues are troubling me on multiple levels. Locally, we’re working through what to do with the town hall. Plans are incubating to build a new complex, co-locating all local government facilities. The price attached to that is five million. But this is a town which already carries a heavy structural debt, has a large headcount and payroll, and has been cutting services while increasing service fees. Spending more money doesn’t seem prudent.

Nationally, I’m waiting to see what the jobs reports and inflation looks like next month. The Iran War has pushed up prices. We’re in a momentary lull with the war but Trump is issuing new threats, increasing tension again. This comes after he said that Iran gave him a very nice gift, and that Iran and the U.S. were negotiating, which Iran denies.

On a parallel course, the U.S. said it destroyed another four more ‘narco-terrorists’ when they destroyed another boat. No evidence has been presented to date that the people they’re killing are involved with drug smuggling, or that the drugs were destined for the U.S.

Different trouble-oriented songs were served up by The Neurons in the morning mental music stream. I ended up with a 957 recording of B.B. King of “Troubles, Troubles, Troubles”. It’s such a classic sound and just fits my mood.

I hope the best for you and yours, no matter where you are. May peace and grace carry you forward through all your troubles.

Cheers

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