Tag: animals

Floofeopathy Therapy

Floofeopathy Therapy (floofinition) – Alternative medical principles practiced by animals based on theories that animals can detect illnesses and diseases and help other creatures fight their medical issues and recover.

In use: “She, being human, wasn’t familiar with floofeopathy therapy, but a few days before she went to the doctor and discovered she had breast cancer, her stripped tabby and her miniature collie came to her, settled on either side of the affected area, and stared deep into her eyes. They did this whenever she rested, a routine that persisted until the cancer appeared to go into remission.”

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Floofmanitarian

Floofmanitarian (floofinition) – Person promoting animal welfare and reform.

In use: “Of course Barbie talks to her animals. Animals are people, too, deserving of as great or greater protection than humans, because humans can speak up for themselves whereas animals can’t. That was where it all started, as a one-person operation rescuing and fostering orphans. Now she was a floofmanitarian, running a global organization dedicating resources to educating others about animal rights.”

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Confloofporary

Confloofporary (floofinition) – Animals sharing a location or existence at the same time, especially in regards to household pets.

In use: “Jade lived for twenty-one years, counting a Samoyed (Max) as her confloofporary, along with three other cats — Rocky, Samwell, and Trace — a hamster, several lizards, and a parrot, along with five humans.”

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Floofson

Floofson (floofinition) – Male offspring of an animal.

In use: “Marty’s floofsons were perfect little replicas of him, black with white whiskers, a white diamond on their chests, and a long narrow tail.”

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Floofpetitive

Floofpetitive (floofinition) – 1. Action or activity persistently completed for an animal, especially a pet.

In use: “His floofpetitive routine began every morning with fresh water — two bowls — followed by the feeding of the three feline princes, and then the daily morning love session (each demanded private personal time to be petted and doted upon), and the litter box cleaning. The routine was done again in the evening.”

2. An activity or motion repeated many times by an animal.

In use: “Whenever Pam sat down, her cat jumped up on her lap and commenced floofpetitive grooming of her face and hair, often employing her paws to hold Pam’s head still.”

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Exflooftrate

Exflooftrate (floofinition) – 1. To remove oneself from an animal with stealth.

In use: “Many people fall asleep and awaken to find a favorite pet asleep with them, looking as sweet as fresh cinnamon rolls, forcing them to exflooftrate themselves so as not to disturb their slumbering fur friend.”

2. To covertly or surreptitiously move an animal, preferably without disturbing them.

In use: “The sick dog was asleep on the floor. She exflooftrated her canine friend to the bed, where a heating pad would help warm his tired, old body.”

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Sternflooftation

Sternflooftation (floofinition) – 1. Act of talking firmly or verbally disciplining an animal, especially a pet.

In use: “Despite Becky’s daily sternflooftation before she left for work, the cat and dog always got in trouble while she was away, creating mayhem in a bathroom, bedroom, or living room.”

2. An especially solemn or serious display by an animal.

In use: “After she pretended to throw the toy for the kittens, the three tabbies sat down in coordinated sternflooftation to stare at her.”

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Flooficane

Flooficane (floofinition) – An animal that makes a huge mess.

In use: “Little Max was a BIG flooficane — a category one beast — who left things overturned, destroyed, and broken on his floofpages through the house.

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Flooftization 

Flooftization floofinition) – An animal’s process of mapping places where they like to sleep, eat, play, or observe.

In use: “New pets in a home often embark on flooftization, walking around and sniffing, testing places for where others slept or sat, seeing if it would work for them.”

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Fall Out Floof

Fall Out Floof (floofinition) – Floofmerican hard flock (floof rock) punk band formed in 2001 in Floofcago, Illinois. Named after a character on the television show The Simpsons, the band achieved major success in 2005. Although they went on a four-year break at one point, the band remains active.

In use: “The Fall Out Floof’s major success first came in 2005 with two mainstream hits, “Floof Floof” and “Sugar, We’re Going Floof”.

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