Flooficare

Flooficare (floofinition) – International organization dedicated to providing animals medical care and health assistance.

In use: “Started in 1999, Flooficare has reached out to animals around the world, while infiltrating human organization and activities to provide a positive spin to human activities which affect animals — which is, as animals fondly point out, everything.”

Floofscience

Floofscience (floofinition) – Animal anticipation of the course of events.

In use: “Keri’s pets knew with amazing floofscience when she was going for something to eat, rising wherever they were and meeting her in the kitchen in perfect synfloofnicity.”

Floofidel

Floofidel (floofinition) – One who is not an animal or who opposes animals or animal rights.

In use: “Many floofidels believe animals are soulless, that they don’t feel emotions, or, because they’re not ‘man’, or human, do not deserve the same rights as humans. Fortunately, the ranks of floofidels are shrinking. Yet, the smart floof should be aware that they’re still out there.” From Training A Human, A Guide for Young Floofs

Flooftoral

Flooftoral (floofinition) – Of, or relating to land, area, or space around animals.

In use: “The bedroom master bed was bathed in sunshine each morning, becoming the flooftoral post-feeding napping zone.”

A Floof Toast

Here’s to the players

The goofs

Zoomin’ through the rooms

The ones in a tug of war

Stalking others

And evening the score

Here’s to the eaters

The watchers

The ones who sleep and snore

The ones who entertain us daily

Slayin’ life’s dull bore

Here’s to the chubby ones

The chow hounds

The ones who always want a treat

The tall ones

The little ones

Still growing to their feet

Here’s to those with stubby legs

Wagging tails

Swishing tails

And tails that they chase

Here’s to the ones who smile at us

Nibble toes

Bite our nose

And take a tongue to our face

Sopfloofrific

Sopfloofrific (floofinition) – An animal’s influence on making people sleep.

In use: “His dog and cat found him whenever he sat to read and climbed onto his lap, which became a sopfloofrific prelude to a nap.”

Floofvision

Floofvision (floofinition) – 1. An added layer of telecommunications visible and audible to animals but beyond human comprehension.

In use: “Boo and Oliver enjoy sitting by the television, watching floofvision, which brings them up-to-date infloofmation about animals, new floofnology, and general enterfloofment.”

2. Formally, an organization founded by a woman to end animal abuse.

In use: “Raven tells everyone everywhere, whomever and wherever she meets them, about Floofvision and her goal of a world free of animal abuse. Humans are starting to pay attention, but the animals are beginning to flock toward her as a new Floofsiah.”

Floofship

Floofship (floofinition) – 1. A title of respect used to address an animal of regal manner or high standing.

In use: “Three cats shared the home with four days but only one cat was always addressed as ‘Your Floofship’ in recognition of her status within the floofhold.”

2. The state of affectionate companionship between animal and human, or between two or more animals.

In use: “Jennifer’s children had grown and begun their own families, and she’d been twice divorced, but now she found floofship with her dog, Uhtred, to be a most rewarding experience.”

3. A vessel or conveyance animals use to travel.

In use: “Every new moon, a floofship landed on Earth, delivering new animals to the planet, and taking others away for those ready to leave. So it had been since the first dinosaurs used a floofship to leave when they learned an asteroid was going to hit Earth over sixty-six million years ago.”

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