Tag: animals

Schefloofule

Schefloofule – (floofinition) – An animal’s timetable about when things should be done.

In Use: “Many animals demand that their schefloofule be obeyed, with dogs and cats doing things like beating on their food bowl when they’re supposed to be fed.”

In Use: “Many people often complain about their cat’s schefloofule because it includes things like playing or being fed at a time when the human wants to be asleep.”

In Use: “Dogs thrive on routine, and when changes are forced into their schefloofule, they need an adjustment period.”

Recent Use: “Videos and stories on social media have surfaced show how floofs have adopted their people’s routines as their schefloofules and are adamant that they be followed to the minute when it comes to feeding or going to bed for the night.”

“Feed me! It’s dinner time.”
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Bowltending

Bowltending (floofinition) – 1. Tendency among animals to stay by the food bowl.

In Use: “The new puppy named Romeo tended toward bowltending, often sleeping in it after eating his share, keeping other animals from eating.”

In Use: “Small but fierce, Barry bowltended, snapping and growling at the others who tried to eat some food.”

2. Habit among animals to closely monitor what people are eating.

In Use: “Eating at his computer, Matt had to defend his food against Max as the big floof jumped up into bowltending mode.”

Recent Use: “With assiduous bowltending and heavy doses of cute, housefloofs are often able to eat whatever their taste buds desire.”

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Tailguistics

Tailguistics (floofinition) The study of how animals use their tails to communicate. Origins: Oregon, United States, 2017

In Use: “Through tailguistics, scientists have verified what a dog’s wagging tail or a cat’s slashing tail means; the bigger question confronting them is, how is all of this passed on between animals?”

Recent Use: “Mapping animals’ brins and recording the signals between brain and the tail, scientists in California studying tailguistics were able to create TailTalks, an app for animals which lets them speak aloud in different languages.”

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Blufloofery

Blufloofery (floofinition) – Behavior or sounds made by animals which are aggressive or overly boastful. Origins: California, United States, late nineteenth century.

In Use: “The established house dog, Duke, approached the new feline floofies. Just a few weeks old, they were instantly blufloofery, threatening the big boxer with SHPC: spits, hisses, puffed fur, and claw swipes.”

Recent Use: “People who rescue abused animals often must deal with a blufloofery dog and use patience, a calm voice, time, and treats to win the floofs over.”

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Neitherfloof

Neitherfloof (floofinition) – An animal who can’t be found where expected, or doesn’t eat or act as expected or desired. Origins: unknown, in use since the first animals began living with humans.

In Use: “Many people with housefloofs have experienced the frustration of neitherfloof when they buy their pets treats, new food, or a new toy, only for their fur buddy to disdainfully walk away from the offering.”

In Use: “The little neitherfloof was a master at hiding in the house, and his human friends could often be overheard as they searched the house, ‘He’s not in here, either.'”

Recent Use: “Neitherfloofs often worry their human slaves when they disappear outdoors and don’t return for days, found neither here nor there.”

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Floofshine

Floofshine – Feelings of joy, happiness, or relief felt when encountering an animal. Origins: Boston, MA, United States, 1964

In Use: “Kai loved encountering Marvel when he got home after being at work. The dog’s grinning face and heavy tail wag was more satisfying than any work project, more relaxing than a glass of wine, and more inspiring than any music he’d ever heard.”

In Use: “Science is still working to verify floofshine’s impact on people’s health, but people with animals as housemates and friends already have a strong idea of the positive impact that floofs deliver.”

Recent Use: “Even after death, floofshine from a departed housefloof can linger for months, thanks to videos, social media, and photographs.”

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Chunkofloof

Chunkofloof (floofinition) – 1. An overweight animal. (Origins: late 1990s, early world wide web.)

In Use: “Cunning at finding and getting her treats out of cupboards (often aided by the cat), Annie Barkley quickly grew into an adorable chunkofloof.”

2. A large collection of animal toys, tools, or memfloofabilia. (Origins: 2014, “The Official Guide to the Floofiverse,” McMeowing, Barks, and Wings.)

In Use: “Most homes with pets have a chunkofloof, and I’m no exception, with a cupboard full of food, dishes, brushes, and toys for my floofhearts.”

Recent Use: “Monica shared a video of her chunkofloof, China, building up a chunkofloof of things China was stealing form the neighbors.”

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Floofuzzle

Floofuzzle (floofinition) – 1. To silence an animal through sound, motion, treats, food, or intimidation. Origins: Late floofish, the United States, early 1990s.

In Use: “The trouble with floofuzzling Flowerpuss was she was hellasmart and immediately understood that if she threw a noisy flooftrum, Beth would shower her with treats to floofuzzle her.”

2. Anything that attracts and intrigues an animal. Origins: Middle English, 1528.

In Use: “Hearing something downstairs, Titus leaped up and barked up a storm, and then stood at the top of the staircase, staring down into the darkness, tilting his head to one way and then the other, ears flopping, as he attempted to solve the floofuzzle of the noise he thought he’d heard.”

Recent Use: “Crows seem to love a good floofuzzle, and are experts at figuring things out, even using sticks as tools in their problem solving.”

3. Actions or noises which animals make that confuses others. First used in mid-1950s.

In Use: “Boldly the little patchy white tabby marched up to the giant German Shepherd and delivered a swat on his black nose, causing him to draw back, floofuzzled. The dog seemed to be thinking, ‘What is this bold little creature? How did it get into the house? And what is that smell?'”

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Eloflooftion

Eloflooftion (floofinition) – A style of speaking to an animal especially in private.

In Use: “Derek and Hercules were both substantial individuals, when alone at home, Derek always slipped into a squeaky eloflooftion that had the dog pumping his tail in zest and bark with happiness.”

In Use: “Whenever people entered the house and spotted the kittens, they inevitably told the tiny critters how cute the beings were in eloflooftion like they were talking to human infants.”

Recent Use: “Sometimes eloflooftion isn’t needed because the floof and the human both know how much they love and appreciate one another.

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Floofgetfulness

Floofgetfulness (floofinition) – A condition where things are forgotten or not done because of an animal.

In Use: “He was planning to vacuum the living room carpet but the little kitten was deeply asleep and looked so sweet, he couldn’t bear to disturb the floof and decided he’d do it later. Then floofgetfunless slipped in, and the vacuuming was not done at all.”

In Use: “Enduring a splash of floofgetfulness, Connor left his sandwich out, giving his dog an opportunity to help herself.”

Recent Use: “Demonstrating the profound floofgetfulness of a newby puppy owner, Maurice left the puppy running free in the house while he ran to a store for a few items, and returned to a disaster zone.”

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