Meet the Beatles

With snow blinding me and an icy wind using a scalpel on my face, I thought I’d made a stupid fucking mistake. Lowering my head as far as I could behind the windscreen, I kept on the throttle, hoping that I wasn’t passing the trio or that I’d run ’em over. I should’ve been on them by now. I’d seen them on the cameras at the two hundred yard marker. They were almost stopped then. Since, the snow’d come on proper. No way they’d gotten closer to the house, I was sure.

I wasn’t completely stupid, though. I’d tied a rope to the garage ‘fore I left it and another to the buggy’s rear bumper. Even if I didn’t find the three, I’d been able to get myself back to the house. This had gone past being a rescue thing, acquiring an aura of a personal goal because I was remembering the time I’d failed. I wasn’t failing again. I hadn’t fought to live and survive just to fail helpin’ others. No.

Almost running into the pole I’d planted years before as a marker helped orient me. I’d deviated from a straight line by ’bout forty feet. Turning right, I squinted against the swollen battering flurries and drove into the wind, cursing myself, the weather, the people, my humanity, and my stupidity. Then, like a chance as I was passing ’em, a blue garment flashed at me on my right.

Jesus, I was passing them. Dropping off the gas, I swerved right and swamped the buggy in a snowdrift. Righting it with a combo body-lean, wheel turn, and burst of throttle, I twisted right. The blue loomed up. I aimed right for it. As I did, I saw obscured shadows that had to be the other two.

On their knees, the blue-clad figure was waving their arms at me. Wind tortured hair around an exposed white face. A mouth yawed open below dark, hopeless eyes.

I pulled the buggy in amongst them. Between me and blue, we wrangled the other two onto the buggy’s back. One of them was such dead weight, I was leaning ninety degrees toward the certainty that they’d died. I didn’t wanna drag a dead person home, but since I didn’t know indisputably, my course was set.

With them in the buggy’s shallow bed, and blue on the buggy’s passenger side of the sole bench seat, I grabbed the rope up and hit the gas for home. It was damn slow going, as I had to keep pullin’ the rope in and adjusting my course. My speed had to be kept down lest the buggy’s bumpy ride tossed the three rescuees out.

Dusk was grabbing the land and I was frozen exhausted by the time the rope led me home. Back into the garage, I pulled the door to and closed it up, just about shutting out the cold and the shrieking wind. Blue became livelier then, gushing tearful thanks at me. The other two were in greens, grays, and blacks, pants, sweatshirts, coats, hats, and scarves, anything, I guess, to be warm and protected. Still, it seemed like scarce stuff to be wearing in that shit outside. I wondered where the hell they’d come from, why’d they’d been out there, and why’d they’d been coming my way. With blue’s help, we got the other two out of the garage and into the house.

Gasping, sniffing back snot, wiping her nose, and pushing her dirty blond hair back, blue introduced herself as Lauren. Her friends were Gwen and Shalla. Shalla proved to be the unconscious one that I thought might’ve been dead. All looked like they’d missed soap and food.

“I’m Bill,” I told ’em, not my real name, but part of the wild Bill persona I’d created for myself. Don’t know why I used it instead of my real name but it felt right. The animals had come in to see what was going on, so I thought I’d introduce them, too. “Meet the Beatles. The shy cat hanging back is Ringo, and the darker tabby is George. Their mom is the bigger tabby, Paula. The husky is John.”

“The Beatles,” Gwen said with a wan, teary smile. Dark banks shuttering her face, her head dropped forward. As she fully slumped onto the floor, Lauren did the same, like the heat was melting ’em down after being out in the cold. In seconds they seemed as unconscious as Shalla.

The animals went about sniffing the comatose new arrivals as I gaped, grappling with what I’d need to do. They were the first people I’d seen in three years, the first women I’d seen in almost four. Though I didn’t really enjoy the prospect, I had to get ’em out of those cold, wet clothes, and into the bed by the fire. Once I’d done all that, I’d have to mark my calendar, cause it was an auspicious day, the day that three female survivors met the Beatles.

I just knew it was going to change my world.

Mixed Bag

I’m free of my lodger, the Foley catheter that’s lived in my urethra and bladder the last thirteen days. Its removal was a relief. Sadly, though, I also had to say good-bye to Sloshy.

Sloshy was the nickname bestowed upon my leg urine collection bag. I wore that bag sixteen hours a day while the Foley was in me. During that time, Sloshy and I grew very attached. I found him to be a warm but shy personality. He rarely intruded on me except to slosh sometimes. He never said anything bad about anyone or anything, and never leaked, dribbled, or squirted. I don’t know if you can give a urine collection bag any greater praise than that.

I felt Sloshy’s sloshing was his way of chuckling. He had a great sense of humor and was often amused by how I drained him or swapped him with the night bag. I think it says a lot about him that the cats were interested in him, attempting to smell him and rub against him. Sloshy was for getting closer to them, but I kept them away. Of a voracious curiosity, he wanted to see more of the world than just the inside of my garments. I tried accommodating his dream by discreetly raising my pant leg when I was out in public so that he may have a look around.

He knew his time had come. Before we separated today, I spent a little private time with him, and then introduced him to the staff that were there to take him away. All agreed that he was the finest urine collection bag that they’d ever met, and also the first to have a name.

My most fervent hope for anyone else that ever has a bag on their leg is that it’s as fine a bag as Sloshy. A person could do worse.

***

Editing Note: I really did name my bag Sloshy and told the medical staff about it. They went along with it, making an entry in my records that my bag was named Sloshy. And, they did agree, they’d never heard a bag be given a name before. Well, there always needs to be first, right? I’m just sorry that I never took a selfie with Sloshy to share.

A Dad Dream

I dreamed my Dad and I were in a store, but a few caveats are needed to qualify this. Much younger, I was taller than I’ve ever been. Dad wasn’t my true father but a colonel I’d worked for in the Air Force. This colonel and I didn’t get along well. Fortunately, he wasn’t in my chain of command. He was the Deputy Base Commander, though, so I had encounters with him almost every day. Another colonel that I was buddies with told me that the other colonel had changed through the years. He said, “He used to seem so happy and had so much fun. Now he barely wants to smile.”

That was my Dad in this dream, not at all like my real Dad. Dream Dad was retired, and I was still active, and outranked him. Neither of us were in uniforms, though. These were matters that I knew.

We were at a Home Depot shopping for plants. Dad wanted to plant flowers at his house. I was there, assisting, following him around. Dad had become forgetful and clutzy. He kept knocking things over. I was concerned, amused, and exasperated as I followed him around and watched the Home Depot personnel cleaning up after his messes.

Dad and I were chatting through all of this, mostly about what he was doing, from what I remember. I began suggesting that we leave but Dad wasn’t ready. It went like this, me following him around as he carried a basket, looking for plants and knocking things over, until I quit following him and drifted away. After I did that, I heard a loud crash. Knowing that he was behind it, I trotted into another area.

A clerk stopped me. “Some hazardous stuff has been spilled,” he said. “We need to clean it up before anyone can go in.”

I looked into the room and saw my dream father standing to one side not far away. Clerks and customers were standing around the perimeter, arms folded, leaning against shelves, as two others cleaned up a mess in the middle.

“Just tell me this,” I said to the clerk. I pointed at Dad. “Did he cause this?” As the clerk nodded, I smiled and said, “That’s what I thought.”

The dream ended.

Profits and Losses

They count the money and measure the angles,

lamenting what must be done.

The cost is high, to keep people alive,

and keep profits a tidy sum.

“What can we do, it’s the America way,

“that made us what we are today.

“Blame the old and dying, the sick, injured and ill,

“for not making enough money

“to pay their bill.”

 

Floofonics

Floofonics (floofinition) – the study of housepet language and syntax.

In use: “His cats started talking to him more as they lived with him, and he developed floofonics, a science of listening to the nuances of their meows. It especially satisfied him to hear the cats talking to him about being fed. They began with sharp, loud meows that continued until he started to deliver their bowls to them. Their voices changed then, the volume dropping as the strident meows changed to mewmuring.”

Mewmuring

Mewmuring (catfinition) – a soft, satisfied meow t often incorporates a trill or a purr, generally associated with a happy, contented cat and frequently heard just before a cat begins eating.

In use: “Sweet mewmuring replaced the kittens’ strident meowing demands, and then the sounds of eating wet food replaced the mewmuring.”

Stuff Gets in the Way

It was a heavy night of dreams. One was remembered with strength and clarity. I wrote it all up but then decided against posting it.

Then, had imaging appointments this morning. One turned into two because the place where they sent me didn’t have the necessary special equipment needed for my imaging. That required me to go to a hospital in another city, where they had the right gear. The first imaging department told me that they’d spoken to the second, and the second wanted me to go right over. I did. Arriving there, they asked me why I was there two hours early.

Umm, whaattt?

I was told they’d see me when they could but I might need to wait. Rushing out of the house, I’d forgotten the book I was reading so I had nothing to do while waiting, except, gasp, stream music to myself, watch people, and think. Grrr.

Here’s a humorous little sidebar to that. I forgot the book because my phone rang as I went to get the book just before leaving the house. Diverted to the phone, I checked the number and didn’t recognize. Well, I was already close to being late and wasn’t going to answer the phone for a caller that wasn’t identified. As I left, I thought, what if it’s imaging, calling to tell me there’s a problem and my appointment has been cancelled, ha, ha.

I was really surprised when that turned out to be the case. Imaging told me that they’d called calling me to stop me from coming in, etc.

By the time I sat to wait in the proper location, a rant was forming. I didn’t feel up to a rant, but I’m letting some of it leak out now.  Just as I’d sat and contemplated the rant, my name was called. The imaging director came out to apologize to me, take me back and get my procedure done, so yea. 

That pleased me but then the staff started asking me, what are we doing to you? My intelligent response was, “Ummm.” Next the doctor shows and asked me, “Do you know why we’re doing this?”

I gave him an explanation of my understanding. He nodded. “Okay, that makes sense.”

It was all done twenty minutes later.

Then I was here to write. I had an excellent writing day yesterday. I’d ended on a cliffhanger the previous day. I had no idea where it was supposed to go. But when I ordered my coffee and sat down to write, I knew what to write, and did it. The process illuminated more of the novel’s concept and story, surprising me. I always credit the muses for my creative process’ tortuosity, but I know it’s all my brain. Whether it’s muses or my brain, the process, which is apparently transparent to me, remains a source of surprise and delight.

Got my coffee. Know what time it is? Yep, time to write like crazy, at least one more time.

Lost in the Words

I pray for hope

I haven’t kept you too

long as I know that you’ll

always be the drink for

me and you, it always

seems like we’re getting lost in the

words can make a difference, especially how

they come and go through the spirals of

our changing lives and times because

what was once familiar has become

strange that I think of this now in

conjunction with where we’ve been and

where things have

gone are the expectations and

dreams are what keeps me

going for the goal that

I pray for hope.

 

Looking Forward

Digging into his pocket, Chasm pulled everything out, dropped it on the counter, and took in the lifetender. Her neck and arms were lean and bare. Alabaster skin and sculpted coal black hair accented her blue eyebrows, green eyes,  red pearl earrings, and brown lips.

Leaning forward, the lifetender watched Chasm’s discs take on green, gold, and silver. Her name holo said she was Kymeri and she was not available.

“You got something,” Kymeri said. Her long, flashing red fingernails raked the discs into order as their denominations came up. “Thousand dollar goldisc, a D, silver century, a wide array of greendiscs.” Her fingernails flashing gold, she tapped the individual discs. Each spoke its value. When she’d tapped the last greendisc, she clicked her fingernails together. Changing to green, her nail said, “Seventeen hundred sixty-seven dollars.”

Just short of a day’s pay, a reflection of the six hours Chasm had worked. “What can I get for that?”

“Night room, joy doll, two squares, dozen drinks, new clothes.”

“What would that leave me?”

“Depends on particulars.”

“Of course. There a budget package?”

Shaking her head, Kymeri said in a low voice, “You don’t want a budget. Get a deluxe, at least. You can afford it. Budget drinks are well liquor or piss beer with compiled food, and the clothes are plastic.”

“Can I budget and then upgrade the drinks to IPA? I don’t need many, maybe three bigs.”

Her fingernails flashing green, the lifetender said, “Okay, a budget room is a bed with a pop out commode, access to the ionizer, private sink, standing space and one chair.”

“Bedding?”

“Included. Joy doll?”

“No. Trade in for the clothes?”

The lifetender shrugged with a dispassionate scan over his black plastic-encased torso. “Your stuff isn’t much. Probably a ten.”

The negotiations were continued. When it was done, Chasm had spent eleven hundred. It scared him to spend so much.

He was ported into his pod. Soft white lights came on. No windows, one large monitor, doublewide bed, chair, sink, port token switch for the ionizer, and popout commode, as promised.

Squirming into the chair, Chasm guzzled his first IPA. Decent stuff, but most importantly, cold. Tension sloughed out of his shoulders. It’d been a good day. He’d found work and was promised more. He was off the street, had a clothing credit, two meals paid for, along with the IPA and water, and still had almost five hundred in discs.

Life was good. Kicking off his shoes, Chasm unfolded his laptop from his hip pocket and plugged it in to play some games.

For the first time in at least a year, he was looking forward to tomorrow.

 

April Showers

I picture April showers of stars at night, 

of singing people and loving sights.

Hopes of April showers of good luck,

keep me going when I feel stuck.

I remember April showers of another time,

when I was young and thought the world would be mine.

I want for April showers when people are less of a dick,

where we help each other

and stop being angry and sick.

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