Flooflan
Flooflan (floofinition) – An animal devised language created to help them communicate with humans.
In use: “After using telefloofy to communicate with the dog and cat in his new house, Bowser discovered that the humans couldn’t comprehend his thoughts, forcing him into using flooflan, which was mostly, IHO, just silly barking, as the humans didn’t seem to understand that, either!”
The Black Dog Dream
This was another military dream but, with twists to it that made the military component less significant.
So, yeah, in the military, young again, running a command post, killing time. I’m waiting for something to happen, so I start going through the daily logs. First, I’m superintendent and I’m expected to review and initial the logs each day. Second, the logs should reflect what checklist actions have been taken by the controllers on duty. I want to ensure they’re doing their jobs as expected when I’m not around.
I go through a bit of that, making comments. The command post is lightly busy around me, slower than a typical day, with people calling in on the radios and the telephones ringing and being answered. My mood is buoyant; whatever I’m waiting to have happen has me hopeful and excited, full of anticipation. Going through personnel rosters, I note that we’ve lost several people, which lowers the assigned total to perfectly fit all needs. That delights me to bizarre levels. Every position filled, and no one left for me to ‘find a job’ for them. Great. I go through the names, recognizing people who worked for me before, and then do a casual audit of the communication security code books on hand, ensuring they’re being properly maintained. Everything is in perfect order!
I’m abruptly changed into civilian clothes, which surprises me, but it’s a good thing, I decide, ala Martha Stewart. Then I’m looking for my dogs. I should have three. (NOTE: In RL, I’ve never owned a dog.) I find one of them. I recall the second one passed away, which saddens me. But the third, a small black Yorkie in my mind, should be there.
I begin walking around the command post, looking for the missing black dog. As I do, others question me about what I’m doing. They don’t seem to be able to comprehend my answers. As I’m responding and still looking, I see the dog bounding down a small ravine. Well, there he is, I think, happy to know that, and going after him.
I leave the command post but can’t find the ravine. I know that’s where the dog, so how do I get there? The dream ends as I’m turning in circles, trying to understand where to go to reach the dog…
Floofxpansion
Floofxpansion (floofinition) – 1. Weight gain or growth exhibited by an animal.
In use: “Logan was a tiny black and white beast when he joined the family, but floofxpansion made him twice as large as his mother by the time he’d reached full maturity, earning him Moose as an affectionate nickname.”
2. An increase in the number of animals in a location.
In use: “Many people end up with floofxpansion when they attempt to foster and end up falling in love with the animal they’re trying to save, and just adopt them.”
Floofplicate
Floofplicate (floofinition) – Something made more complex or problematic because of an animal’s presence or involvement.
In use: “For many, having a pet such as a cat or dog automatically floofplicates budgets and vacationing planning, of course, but pets can also floofplicate such routines as cleaning the house or doing yardwork as the animals arrive and try to ‘help’.”
The Blue Car Dream
This was a surprisingly short dream, and all in blue with very low lighting. The framing for all of this was very tight, staying focused on me — young again, with long, thick hair — and just the car and our very immediate background, which was blurred. I’d just been bequeathed a dark blue car. Low and wide, shaped like a blunt wedge, it was built for speed and barely came up to my thighs. Its wheels were large, and its tires were fat, and its glass was darkly tinted. Dark, dark, dark blue, reminding me of the old Penske Sunoco blue on the cars that Mark Donahue drove at Indy, and Can Am, Trans Am, and sports car racing, I walked around it, looking for a manufacturer’s badge or logo, but found none.
I heard someone — and it might have been me, to be honest, because I think it was in my head — say, “Get in and go.”
Go? Go where? Get in? How?
I didn’t see any door handles. I couldn’t even tell where the doors were. There were no lines or breaks. The car was completely seamless. Its headlights were flat, narrow slits, as were its front air intakes. I thought it could be a BMW, but it could also be a Ferrari or Tesla, McLaren or Mercedes. It could be anything.
As I walked around, scratching my head and going through the question, how does the door open, the door just opened. It was a scissor type door, raising up instead of turning out. I peered into a blue interior that seemed both plush and spartan, built solely for two, and finished in dark blues that were even darker than the body.
Breathless with excitement and anticipation, I slipped in behind the wheel and looked around, sucking up details. The door closed as the seats embraced me. Arms wrapped across my waist and chest, startling and frightening me until I realized they were like seatbelts except they were part of the seat and sealed themselves, holding me tight in the soft seat. The steering wheel was small and moved toward me when I reached for it. A soft rumbling began. A dashboard with low blue lights lit up.
I chuckled to myself, thinking, someone likes blue. The steering wheel was flat on its top and bottom and fit perfectly to my hands. The car smelled new. But, how was that possible, when someone left it to me or gave it to me?
I selected a gear with a small, black handle to my right and pressed on the gas. The car moved silently forward into a blue-black night as I grinned and thought, this will be fun.
Dream end.
Worth Noting
David Walden, Computer Scientist at Dawn of Internet, Dies at 79
I worked for IBM for over a decade after retiring from the military and became aware of David Walden’s name while I was there. I’d heard of the work of the I.M.P. before that while reading about ARPANET. People like Walden contributed to this thing called the net and develop it to the point where we have the connectivity of today. I take the net for granted, complaining about it when it’s slow or won’t load, along with the work that Walden did, but it’s pretty amazing when you regard its technology.
RIP, David Walden
The Magic Models Dream
The dream began with me in a small town with two friends, a male and female. We were all youngish, I’d guess in our twenties. An attack by Russian aircraft on another place in the world was underway. I had three models of the aircraft involved in my hands. These models were about a foot long but made of plastic. Somehow, using magic and the models, we were able to down the five jets. We knew this by watching it in a shallow puddle of water. Although the three of us were involved, the other two credited me with doing it.
Afterward, as we walked around the small town, with its parks and wide, quiet streets, news of what we’d done spread. People kept showing up out of nowhere asking for details and then asking if we could do it again. I was certain that we could. My female friend arrived with a video camera and told me that she wanted to interview me. Then she would broadcast it and put it on the net. I agreed to that, and was ready with the models, but small matters kept delaying us from beginning the interview.
She said that we would do it later and walked off after I agreed. I walked around more with the models and came to a fast moving, swollen creek. While watching the water rising up over rocks and crashing down, I grew aware that I could see other scenes happening in it. They mesmerized me. Leaning in to see things more clearly, I lost one of the models in the water. After some frantic searching for it, I spotted it floating down the creek and rushed after it.
With a little effort, I captured the model as it passed under a bridge. I realized then that it was time for me to meet my friend for the interview. As I arrived there, people approached me and told me that news crews from CBS and NBC were there to interview me. Someone else told me someone wanted to have me on their television show but I couldn’t understand the television show.
I saw my friend set up with the camera by a pavilion under a wide oak tree. I told everyone that I had to do my interview with her first and then walked in her direction.
Dream end.
