Category: humor

Friday’s Theme Music

It’s a day of conflicting signals. Friday, February 6, 2026. Ashland began at 37 F at my house. Yesterday was gorgeous, dry as summer, warm as spring. Today has the southern sky hazy with a little gray with blue commanding the remaining vista. Highs will escalate into the mid to upper 60s.

Papi and I enjoyed sunshine in the back. He rolled around in warm grass while I cheered, declining his invitation to join him rolling around. Returning inside, I offered him some of my morning coffee, which he declined with a mild golden-eyed gaze.

I perused the news with a little edge of worry about what might have happened overnight or in the early hours. Yes, there was more bad news.

Trump posted an immature video on his social media account depicting former President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama as monkeys. After immediate and widespread criticism, the video was removed and a staffer was blamed.

Unfortunately, I think it undermines Trump’s assertions of being a unifier or peace president. Consistent, emerging patterns keep showing Trump as the opposite of peace and unity. His silence since matters as much as the initial posting, as a unifier would be out front, apologizing and taking responsibility.

Some probably theorize that Trump was trying to reinvigorate his base or that sharing the video was an effort to distract from the growing Epstein noise, or the less than impressive TrumpRx rollout. They may be correct, for all I know. Trump remains opaque and transparent.

The Neurons ended up feeding me “December” by Collective Soul in my morning mental music stream. I sang along, “Don’t scream aloud, don’t think aloud, turn your head, now baby, just spit me out.” A song written out of hope and frustration, it feels like a fitting song for today, after Trump disparaged the Obamas, who offered hope when they loved in the White House.

I hope Friday finds you safe and healthy. May peace and grace hold and carry you.

Cheers

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The Brown Cougar Dream

My wife and I arrived at a resort hotel, meeting our friend, Bob and his wife. Real-life note: this is not the same Bob from my previous dreams, but a friend and co-worker from my military days. The wife in this dream wasn’t his real-life wife.

Bob, who was prematurely bald, had thick black in the dream. My wife and I had just arrived. Bob and his wife came by to greet us and make plans.

I noticed some filth on the ceiling. It disgusted me so I looked for something to clean it up. I found some spray and sprayed it all over but then needed a ladder and rag. A young hotel worker asked me what I was doing. I explained myself. He shook his head and reassured me, “Don’t worry about it, we have it covered. It’s not your problem.”

I went back into the room and noticed the spray had already made the ceiling mess almost invisible.

Bob and I ended up outside, where it was like a desert after a rainstorm. He was carrying a young animal he’d rescued. Noticing a young brown cougar down the hill, I followed behind Bob to protect him from the cougar and found a large stick to use as a weapon.

Waiting on a porch for Bob’s return, I saw the cougar watching me. As that registered, the cougar approached. Raising the stick, I yelled and made myself big.

Sitting down, the cougar asked, “What are you doing?”

“I’m making myself big and making noises to scare you away.”

The cougar chuckled. “Did you really think that was going to work?”

“That’s what they tell us to do.”

“Anyway, you’re safe for now,” the cougar said, “but you scheduled to die tomorrow, and I’ll eat you.”

I was appalled and vowed not to let that happen.

The cougar shrugged. “It’s going to happen. It’s on the schedule.” He indicated a bright pink and blue poster. I read the poster but saw nothing about my death on it.

Back in the hotel room, I showered and cleaned up. Bob came by to see if I was ready. I told him that I needed to shower. I took off my clothes and stepped into the shower and then realized, what am I doing? I already showered.

I was now naked downstairs and needed to up to my room. Entering the stairwell, I caught a reflection of myself and found I was astonishingly good-looking — much younger, lean and muscular, with a thick head of dark brown hair swept to one side. As I started up the steps, a young woman entered.

“Eek,” she said, pretending to turn away. Covering her face with a hand, she looked at me between her fingers. “A naked man.”

I laughed and apologized, continuing up the steps, and encountered another woman. “Locked out without your clothes?” she mused.

“Yes, that’s what happened.”

She chuckled. “We’ve all been there.”

Now dressed, I joined Bob and our wives in another area of the resort. I saw the brown cougar in the crowd, watching me. I realized that I’d forgotten something in the room and needed to go back. Bob drew up a complex map, showing me where we were and how to get back to my room, 1004, at the top of the building. Although his map was detailed, I felt bewildered and said, “I’ll never find my way back through that maze.”

Bob said, “Alright, let me go with you, at least part of the way, until you know where you’re at.”

Dream end.

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Thursday’s Theme Music

Sunshine lit up the room today. It’s Thursday, February 5, 2026, in Ashland but the weather defies that date. Papi and I went out to the back patio and enjoyed sunshine.

“It feels balmy out,” Papi noticed.

“I agree,” I answered.

Oh, wait; reverse that. Papi agreed to me, or so I thought from how he threw himself down and rolled around, inviting a belly rub and purring.

62 F online, my home says it’s 69. White pulled-taffy clouds have a small footprint in the dominant blue sky. Highs might crest 70.

Talking with friends last night, we agreed, nice weather but worrisome for the coming summer’s water needs. Meanwhile, sis sent me photos of her glistening snowclad yard, pretty but 22 degrees.

I showed sis’s snow photo to my wife. “Yes, it’s pretty until it melts,” my wife offered. I agreed.

My wife mentioned that TrumpRx was launching tonight but didn’t think it would do well.

Trump certainly has a chaotic and checkered history that sets his efforts up for doubt. As for TrumpRx, we’ll see. Only time and facts will reveal the truth.

The Neurons pulled a strange song into the morning mental music stream. “Kings and Queens” by Aerosmith came out almost fifty years ago. I knew it from their album but I don’t think I’ve ever heard it on the radio. Yet, there I was, singing it to myself in the kitchen as I fulfilled Papi’s feeding needs.

I suspect the song came up because I’m serving Papi and thinking about recent political developments.

Onward into the day’s mettle with hopes that peace and grace find and carry us. See you on the other side of the coffee cup.

Cheers

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Mixed Signals

As part of a celebratory do my wife recently organized, we ended up with 100 plastic plates. Small, white, with gold trim, we’d purchased them so guests could enjoy some finger foods.

She had them stacked in the sink and mentioned that she had to wash them. I asked, “Want me to wash them?”

My wife replied, “I didn’t want them to go into the landfill, and I think they can be used again. I already washed them, but I think they feel greasy, so I want to wash them again.” Then she walked away.

I washed the plates.

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Marker

The cracks show –

Spreading

He missed them

At first

Clocking them

Only after

Others

Commented.

He finds

Life emptying out

Contemplating

His time chasing

Time

Until time ran

Out of

Sight

Leaving him

With

All the time

Needed.

Giving him a

Smile –

Clues were

Forever

There

An unfelt

Hand

Pushing.

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Sunday’s Theme Music

February entered Ashland looking just like January’s little sibling. No snow or precipitation, blue sky mottled with slivers of nascent white clouds, 37 F but climbing quick under solid sunshine. We expect a high of 54 F today, not bad if you can get it, but we need snow.

Back east, that is not a problem as videos with one headline proclaiming, “Bomb cyclone explodes, dragging Arctic blast over US states”.

Sure is true where my family resides in Pennsylvania. Sis sent a flurry of photos of the snow still embracing her area. She asked if I was aware that Mike Seidel was on the air over on Fox Weather. I wasn’t aware, I answered, because I don’t watch Fox Weather or Fox News.

I do and did watch other news and was pleased that five-year-old Liam Conejo Ramos is back home in Minneapolis with his father. His father sought asylum from Ecuador in the United States when the Border Patrol decided he was here illegally, shipping the father and son to a Texas detention center. Homeland Security, Border Patrol, and ICE all insist that they didn’t arrest or detain the five-year-old but didn’t give a term for what it was.

SNL gave us some laughter with a terrific skit about a diehard MAGA mom, but I wondered how much truth the humor harbored.

Another piece of SNL humor touched on the news cyclone around Trump in their cold open. They suggested the Minnesota ICE surge was to distract from the Epstein files being released, but then the Epstein files had to be released to distract from the ICE violence in Minnesota.

Papi the ginger floof again provided me with theme music. For whatever reasons, Papi came in from outside charged around the house, reversing directions and fishtailing like he drove a getaway car. Watching that as I laughed, The Neurons spun “I Get Around” by the Beach Boys in the morning mental music stream.

Hope this Sunday finds you with peace, grace, warmth, and safety as the second month of 2026 takes over. Cheers

1

A Coffee House Moment

Coffee house hissing, loud laughter, and boisterous conversations swam around me. Waiting in line, a barista prepared quiches and burritos and told me about her cat until I reached the register.

Jessie, the cashier, has grave eyes with a welcoming but cautious smile. As she rang up my order, I tilted my gaze to a cheap-looking white ring on her third finger.

Wondering if it had symbolic meaning, I suggested, “That’s an interesting ring.”

Holding her hand up, Jessie regarded the ring and chuckled. “My sister-in-law lost her wedding ring in the ocean one year. I started worrying that I’d lose mine, so now I only wear my wedding ring on special occasions.”

Turning the ring on her finger, she looked off and smiled to herself. “I wear rings like this instead. I have a bunch of them and let my daughter pick them out for me. She’s say, ‘Today, you’ll wear pink.’ Or, ‘I think you’ll wear orange.'”

We laughed together. Walking off, I imagined her daughter giving her a pink ring to put on her finger.

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Tuesday’s Theme Music

Tuesday slid into Ashland under a cloud. 46 F out, rain and sunshine are expected today, January 27, 2026. Our high will be in the mid-fifties.

Buoyed by a powerful dream, I’m in an upbeat and optimistic mood today. I know a lot of crap is going on in the world and many people have it bad. That weighs on me and yet, I feel empowered today.

A friend sent me an interesting video. It’s all AI. My Neurons urged me to use it as today’s theme music. I’ll do so. It’s a catchy punky-influenced tune, made with AI’s help. The chorus has found a home in my morning mental music stream. From Sean Hayes at Scaredketchup, here is, “ICE, F**k You”.

I hope you’re in an upbeat, optimistic place despite the world load, and that it leads to a happier place for all of us. Cheers

2

The Price of the Prize

In an old news story — two weeks ago, ‘old news’ in the smash and grab Trump news cycle — María Corina Machado, 2025 Nobel Peace Prize recipient, gave her prize to Trump.

I suspect she was secretly paid to give her prize away.

An effective front man for the executive branch’s growing lawlessness, keeping him placated is paramount. Otherwise, he began obsessing on losing the 2020 elections again.

Frustration was high. Nothing seemed to lift Trump’s mood. He wanted Greenland but Denmark wasn’t selling, even though he’d threatened more tariffs. His ballroom’s construction was mired down. ICE’s growing violence was driving his popularity and approval ratings to new lows, and the issue about affordability just was not disappearing. Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos were calling almost every day, ranting, “This is not what we paid for!”

“We need to meet,” Vought hissed to Trump’s cabinet. “Something needs to be done before senators and representatives start growing some balls because they’re going to lose an election.”

“Well, I’m out,” War Secretary Hegseth said. “We already abducted President Maduro from Venezuela. I thought that would make him happier.”

“I know,” Noem said. “We’re doing everything we can over in Homeland Security but now judges are growing a spine. Who do they think they are?”

“I agree,” Miller said. “I thought adding Trump’s name to the Kennedy Center would make him happier.”

“I have an idea,” Bondi suggested. “Let’s approach Machado and see what her price is for giving Trump her Nobel Peace Prize.”

Vice President Vance nodded. “A Noble Prize, yes! That sounds like the perfect pacifier for him.”

Feelers were put out to Machado. Their pitch was basic. “We’re in charge of Venezuela now. We can put you into office. Support you with the strength of the U.S. military. Fund your campaign. All you need to do is give Donald Trump your peace prize as a gift. Come on, what will it hurt? You said that you thought he deserved it. And the record will always show that you won. It’s a win-win.”

Officially, they said Machado came up with it on her own, perhaps in an effort to gain Trump’s support.

As far as they could tell, it worked. Other than another diatribe at Davos about losing the 2020 election again, Trump stayed on track.

“It’s still early days,” Miller reminded the rest at the next meeting. “I think we need to do something bigger, something to really put a smile on his face.”

Everyone’s shoulder’s slumped. “Think,” Bondi encouraged. “What can we do? Doesn’t anyone have any idea what will make him happier for a little while, at least until the midterms?

“Arrest Biden?” Miller said with wide-eyed eagerness.

“Too much,” Hegseth answered.

“What about this?” Bessent said. “Let’s have a Trump coin minted.”

Trump’s cabinet and advisors held their breath in thought.

“That’s more tangible,” Miller said.

Eyes bright and large over a grin, Hegseth exclaimed, “No living president has their name on a coin.”

Vought reached for the phone. “I’ll call our legislative lackeys and get them working on it.”

“Make sure it’s gold,” Bessent said.

Vought sneered. “Of course. We know that Trump is a fool for gold.”

“Okay, I think we’re done for today,” Bondi said. “Americans are getting angry. New polls will probably show that.”

Miller scowled. “That’s because he’s so great, misunderstood, and underappreciated.”

“Anyway,” Bondi continued. “We need to get ahead of the curve.”

Vought smiled. “Of course. Let’s get to work on those memorial gates he keeps going on about. We need some kind of TrumpCares program, too. Doesn’t matter what it does.”

“I’ll take that on,” Kennedy replied. “I know how he thinks.”

Relieved, the group filed out, feeling happier about the future for the first time in days. “It’s good to know to have a direction,” Vought said to Kennedy.

Kennedy nodded. “I just hope it makes Elon happy.”

Vance piped up. “By the way, has anyone seen Trump today?”

2

Sunday’s Theme Music

Not my snow; photo from sis in Plum, a suburb of Pittsburgh, PA.

It’s Sunday, January 25, 2026, in Ashland — if I’m reading my computer right. I trust my machine to tell me the truth but as things evolve into greater complications, it’s not always trustworthy.

We have dry weather, sunshine, and blue skies. The temperature gap has returned. My home system shows it’s 25 F. Online cites the temperature as 29 but Alexa says it’s 40. High temperatures in the fifties are expected.

Two different issues draw my attention as the massive winter storm takes on most of the United States, and Minnesota deals with unrest after another ICE shooting. Fortunately, I have a cat.

Papi’s weather focus is extremely limited. He shows more interest in food, although, power to him, he really likes helping me with yardwork. If I’m out cutting things, pulling weeds, and so on, Papi’s steely green-eyed gaze inspects my work. Both annoying and cute, because I worry about him getting hurt.

He and I went out to salute the sun in the back, our habit going back for years. We came in, I fed him, then began preparing my breakfast. Through the kitchen window, I watched my neighbor across the street. Every day, he walks to the end of his driveway, faces the sun, and stands, eyes closed, for several minutes. Today, with this cold, he was returning to his house within two minutes — about the same amount Papi and I did.

Sis’s on-the-scene report from Pennsylvania said everything is closed, finishing, “Been snowing since it started, middle of the night. ‘Ooo, baby, it’s a white world,’ is the official song.” She sent a photo of her front view, with her son-in-law’s car parked in the driveway. The snow is expected to keep falling through Monday.

Eight southern states are suffering power failures from ice due to the storm. Hope people are able to stay warm and safe.

Likewise, I hope everyone in Minnesota is safe, and stays safe.

Today’s song was inspired by Papi and my wife. Papi wanted food and attention. My wife wants assistance with some running around. The Neurons responded to the exchanges by playing “I’m Your Puppet” by James and Bobby Purify. I admit, I looked up who performed it and turned it into a hit that I often heard on my transistor radio when I was young.

These were the lyrics in mind when The Neurons took the song to my morning mental music stream:

Your every wish is my command
All you gotta do is wiggle your little hand
‘Cause I’m your puppet
I’m your puppet

The lyrics were modified from hand to paw for Papi.

Let peace and grace finally track us down, stay a while, and restore some sense of optimism for the future. Cheers

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