Category: humor

Frida’s Theme Music

It’s supposed to be the first day of summer in Ashlandia: Frida, June 20, 2025. But it’s fifty and has a certain autumn flavor to the air. Sun and blue sky have surrendered to charcoal clouds. Rain veils aren’t there but an atmosphere of impending rain lurks. Today’s high will only be 61.

The cat is not happy. Prancing out for sunshine, he stops and looks around. “Right,” I say. “Where’s the sun?” The cat doesn’t say anything. He’s not much for conversing. “Want to come back in?” I ask. The cat’s gaze at me is rich with skepticism and disappointment. “I can’t control the sun,” I say. “I’m going back in.” I go in and close the door. A few minutes later, I check on the cat. He’s sulking. I open the door. He hurries in. “I agree,” I say. He meows for food and is given a third breakfast to make up for the sunless suffering he endured.

My mouth is healing. This is Post Op Day 2. Teeth are missing from the upper right and left sides. I’m not allowed hot stuff yet. I make oat oatmeal and let it cool, doing the same with my black coffee. I inhale the coffee’s aroma, comforting myself that I can soon gulp down a tepid splash. I make my warm water with salt and swish, rinse, and spit, as required, marking it off my mental checklist, along with two Ibuprofen and my Amoxicillin. I have pain killers but I don’t use them. Just give me some coffee, damn it.

My wife is leaving for the gym. “Do you want me to pick you up anything?” she asks.

“Sunshine,” I sniff.

“I mean food.”

“No.”

I sit and eat my chilled oatmeal and smell my coffee.

I check my phone for texts. Nothing from Dad’s side in Texas nor Mom’s side in Pittsburgh, PA. Guess both of their issues are temporarily abated.

Today’s music is “How Does It Feel” by London Grammar. The Neurons turned it loose in the morning mental music stream after my wife asked how my mouth felt. “Fine,” I answer, feeling grumbly.

The coffee is cool enough to drink. The sky has gotten darker. It’s almost time for my chlorhexidine gluconate oral rinse. I raise my cup and look out the window. “To summer.”

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Wenzda’s Wandering Political Thoughts

Just putting this out here so we can judge Trump’s failures by his own words:

Unlike Trump, President Obama left office with an agreement with Iran in place. Trump removed the US from that agreement, calling it a bad day. And now, here we sit.

BTW, the United States never attacked Iran militarily during President Obama’s term of office. So, wrong again, TACO.

Wrong, again.

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Twosda’s Wandering Thoughts

It’s an oddity. Today, the coffee shop is filled with men.

Three regulars are among the dozen men. We regulars do our regular things with computers, eyes intense and intent on screens, fingers doing a keyboard dance, sometimes shifting a mouse tango.

The rest are pairs of men. Male couples. They’re all in deep and low-key conversations. Youngest looking are some twenty somethings. Most have ages hovering in the upper thirties to low sixties. I’m too far from any to overhear conversations. There’s little laughter among them. These are serious topics at hand.

Two by two, the meetings are wrapped up. The participants depart. Soon, it’s just me and one other regular, busy with our computers. A small break ensues. Quiets drapes the business. New people arrive. New orders are given. It’s a mix of males and females.

Coffee shop life resumes its normal posturing.

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Twosda’s Theme Music

Welcome, welcome to Twosda, June 17, 2025. We’re continuing a nice weather balance in Ashlandia, dropping into the fifties at night, sunny & cloudy during the day, high of 84 F. No one has been heard complaining.

Although I slept well, I had a night rich with dreams. Papi has refined a way of awakening me which can only be called a bark. I don’t know where this cat learned his bark. I guess he went out and hung around with some dogs, heard them barking, and then imitated them. It’s effective — for him. I wish he’d go back to purrs and nuzzles.

My wife’s ‘movie group’ is meeting today. One of them began hosting about a dozen of her exercise class comrades to watch and discuss movies. Today, they’re watching the 1990 flick, Truly, Madly, Deeply, in which the late Alan Rickman plays a ghost, and Juliet Stevenson is his widow. What surprised me was how many of the rest professed to be unaware of the film. My wife and I both enjoyed it on its theater run and have seen it again since. She is a big fan of it and suggested the film. I’m interested in learning whether others remember the film when they see it again.

Dad’s surgery went well. He told me that his kidney was stented; his wife said, no, he had a nephrostomy tube and drainage bag installed. Come on, give him a break; he’s 92. When I speak to him and ask him for details such as, “Where did they put the stent,” he replies, “Hell, I don’t know. Ask Maxine. She takes notes.” Maxine is his wife (#3, and the longest tenured wife by far).

There’s something wrong with Trump. We have many ideas about what it is. Now we have Catheter Gate & Bag Gate. This is based on Trump’s leaning forward walk, like something is irritating his ass, and photos which seem to show a catheter installed in his johnson area. Since he’s our elected official, don’t we have a right to know? To employ the voice used when Republicans are demanding answers from Democrats, WHAT ARE THEY HIDING FROM US? IS TRUMP DYING? Well, of course he’s dying — just ask Sen. Joni Ernst. But is he dying so fast that he’s failing to do us job? Is he a liability? We the People demand to know the truth about what’s protruding in those photos. Snopes claims they investigated and Trump isn’t wearing a catheter but the Trump Regime may have gotten to them. We want answers and we won’t accept anything reasonable until Trump takes off his pants on national TV and shows us that he’s not wearing a catheter, bag, or diaper. Even then, we probably won’t accept it because that could be Trump clone or a Trumpbot, or AI creating a wholly fake television event.

Trump fled the G7 conference in Canada. He claimed it was because of Mid East tensions but many believe he was just Taco Always Chickening Out again. In this case, the meeting was structured, they weren’t deferring to him, and he wasn’t getting the attention he wanted and kept being quoted saying stupid things, so he fled. That’s so TACO!

Today’s music is “Tough Guy”. It’s a 1980 Reo Speedwagon song. Don’t know why The Neurons plugged it into the morning mental music stream. I was just reading the news online about Trump fleeing the G7 when that song kicked off in the stream.

Coffee has snuggled into my system again. You all have a good one. Here we go, one more time. Cheers

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Frida’s Wandering Thoughts

My wife’s car is over twenty-one years old. Just 110,000 miles on it, it’s her car for buzzing around town. It’s a gray Ford Focus ZX5. I surprised her with it after her previous car was declared totaled when it was rear-ended.

The five in ZX5 means the car has five doors, which includes its hatchback. We bought it new. It’s never broken down on us. The engine is terrific, the brakes are always screeching and complaining, the suspension has sports car aspirations, and the seats were shit. I put seat covers on it ten years ago, which greatly improved the interior’s looks.

Worse for me, though, is her car’s transmission. An automatic, it does this clunky downshift which sounds and feels like the engine is falling out. I took it to Ford after the first few times that it happened; they said, “That’s normal.” I replied, “That’s shit.” I wanted to get rid of the car. Get something newer, maybe a hybrid, which would get better fuel economy and have more modern creature comforts.

Wife says, “Nope. I want to keep my car.” That’s that.

She came to me the other day. “My car is making a new noise.”

“Well, it’s old. It’s not a surprise.”

“It groans a lot. Sometimes it sounds like it’s saying, ‘my knees hurt.'”

My wife is a year younger than me, which puts her in her late sixties. I looked at her. “I think you might be projecting, hon.”

She agreed.

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Just A Little WTF America

It’s another GOP presentation of WTF, America, with special guest host, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis.

Let’s go into Trumptalk mode: Inspired by the terrible and VERY VERY BAD Idiot Trump response to protests in California and Governor Abbott’s stunningly STUPID EFFORTS to escalate violence in Texas by deploying the National Guard against Americans exercising their FIRST AMENDMENT RIGHTS, Gov. DeSantis is encouraging Floridians to hit other Americans with their cars!

Yep, this erstwhile Catholic Republican leader decided to channel his What Would Jesus Do instincts and say, “Jesus would just steer right into people as he flees, because Jesus always preached, keep looking out for yourself and kill others as necessary to protect yourself.”

Ron DeSantis says Floridians have right to hit protesters with cars

I’m sure Jesus would be very happy to see how his values are being deployed in the United States of ‘merica in 2025. For as Jesus said in the Sermon of the Mount, “Don’t ever turn your cheek, be a man and escalate that violence. If they spit, you hit! It’s the law and order way!”

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Just One More Thing

Incessant barking from the neighbor’s dog at 2:30 AM this morning dragged my attention from sleeping to “WTF is that dog barking about.”

Grabbing a flashlight, I flipped on the outdoor lights and torch and headed out of the front door to the side yard alongside the garage where the dog had been barking. Had been barking; Cow Dog, as he’s named, was now quiet. Ten feet from the side yard, a low, guttural growl in the dark ahead slowed my beat. Thinking, “I don’t really need to know what’s there,” I turned around and admired the pretty almost full moon and then trotted back into the house.

This afternoon, a neighbor from the other side approached. “Hey, heads up. Found a large pile of fresh bear scat in my backyard by my travel trailer this morning.”

“Thanks,” I replied. I put one and one together. I don’t know how accurate my math is but I think it added up to a bear in the area.

Yep, local bear tracking software reported a bear was spotted by others within half a mile of my place yesterday. Nice to live alongside wildlife, as long as we keep a respectable distance.

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