This started as blood in my urine a few months back. A CT Scan with contrast showed a lump in my bladder. I went to have a cystoscopy yesterday.
That was an interesting appointment. A med tech, Chris, did the standard intake to update my records. Then he explained that they didn’t have the cystoscopy equipment.
Whaaaat?
It was going to arrive later that day. So I could come back…
Chris left. Ten minutes later, the doctor entered the room.
She did a double take: like, why wasn’t I gowned and in the chair? Pretty funny expression, very human.
Then she sat and we talked. I explained to her that Chris said that the cystoscopy equipment wasn’t there. Oh, the doctor realized she’d misunderstood the staff that morning. She thought they were telling her more equipment was arriving.
She left. I went out to talk to Chris about the situation. Another tech hung up her phone and announced that the equipment was at the hospital warehouse. She was going to race over and pick it up.
Okay. I stayed and waited.
“This might pinch,” Chris said twenty minutes later.
I was naked from the waist down on the chair. Reclined, a flimsy paper sheet covering me. Until Chris uncovered me and injected lidocaine up my urethra.
Pinch? No, it stung in a big way.
That was just the beginning.
The doctor came in. Lubed up her camera. Inserted it into my urethra. She and I watched on a monitor as the camera went up my urethra.
“Arrgh.” I arched up in pain.
She nodded. “Yes, your urethra narrows a lot here. Did you have a Foley catheter before?”
“Yes. Twice.”
“That explains it. Okay, I’m in the bladder. There’s the tumor. Yes, cancer. See it? Looks like a small coral reef on your bladder wall.”
A three cm posterior bladder tumor.
She pulled the camera out. Explained next steps. Surgery in six to eight weeks. I’d be sedated. She’d put a tube up my urethra and then scoop the cancer out. TURBT (transurethral resection of bladder tumor), gemcitabine.
Referral to another doctor for PCNL – Percutaneous Nephrolithotomy – to remove the 1.4 cm stone in my right kidney.
Ashland, southern Oregon — Wednesday, May 5, 2026.
Today’s is a picturesque spring day, Ashland edition — sunshine, clouds, 56 F. They say we’re heading to the lower eighties. We cracked 80 at my place yesterday.
I caught up on some local news last night. A rural hospital crisis is affecting the United States. Been going on for years but getting worse.
Trump’s One Big Beautiful Bill worsened the situation. By removing healthcare subsidies, healthcare premiums shot up. Many people had no choice but to severely cut back.
Asante is already reducing many services at Asante Ashland Community Hospital in my town. Now operating in other southern Oregon cities such as Medford and Grants Pass, they note that they’ve lost money in the first six months of this fiscal year and cut personnel. Part of the reason why they’re losing money is buried in a paragraph down in the story:
“Patients covered by private insurance are at the lowest percentage in Asante’s history at just over 14% of all patients so far in 2026.”
Oregon saw average premium hikes of nearly 10% for individuals after Trump’s OBBB took effect. Asante’s CEO noted that many local businesses are being priced out of offering health insurance due to these rising costs. Medicare and Medicaid barely cover the costs they say. It’s not a sustainable model.
Yet, with this crisis going on, Trump pretends to worry about the Iranians having nukes and attacks them.
Trump worries about his own security and image, naming things after himself, wrecking part of the White House to build that ridiculous Epstein ballroom, which went from ‘costing Americans nothing’ to $1,000,000,000.
Trump screams freedom! Security! Peace! Then he has the military attack and kill more people in boats.
So much for law and order.
Waiting to see what Operation Epic LOOK — SQUIRREL! brings today.
Your Trump Quotes of the Day.
He’s so consistently inconsistent!
Today’s song was another one inspired by Papi, my ginger furbrother. I was petting him after giving him his meds. He was purring like mad. But his personality requires that he be given space. I wouldn’t let him go, keeping hold of him until he gave me an annoyed look. Meanwhile, I laughed and sang the lines from “Magic” by The Cars:
I’ve got a hold on you I got a hold on you Got a hold on you
I’m off for my cystoscopy to see what’s going on in my bladder. It’s being done at Asante in Medford so I better do it before they close.
I hope the best possible day of grace, peace, and joy finds you and carries you on through life on a great wave.
A new weather front has moved in. It’s 54 F under layers of clouds and sprinklings of sunshine, a typical Ashlandic spring day. Highs in the upper 70s are forecast for us. Right now, with all those clouds, it feels weirdly chilly.
Good news from the home front. Mom is electing to stay in assisted living and cooperating. She’s also agreed to sell her house and furniture. While it’s welcomed, it’s also so sad for her and our family. She wanted to be there; we wanted her to be there. Yet, practically, it could not work. Personally, I will miss go home, to her house, to hugging her in her living room, chatting with her in her kitchen, helping her with her laundry. And I will miss the many wonderful dishes she used to make. Her potato salad, spaghetti with meatballs, and chili all remain the best I ever had.
I will say, though, my sisters are a little annoying with their texting. They get up early, before six, and text. My first text from them came at 2:12 AM. I have my phone set up to notify me of texts from the family, in case there’s an emergency, but these were casual, informational texts. Okay, rant over.
No, I haven’t spoken to them about it. They’re doing so much to take care of Mom and help, etc. It would be really petty of me to complain to them about the time they send their texts. I’ll just whine here instead. *smile*
I’ve not seen much surface changes on the Trump front. The voting front is rapidly changing as the Roberts Court dish out their rulings and states respond. A situation as messy as first graders fingerpainting is going to get muddy and sloppy. That mud and slop favors the GOP and Trump. That’s why they’re pressing it. Not about democracy; it’s about staying in power.
Meanwhile, it’s been quiet on the Operation Epic LOOK — SQUIRREL! front and the Epstein front.
With the war in Iran at a stalemate, more conversations about the US military’s capabilities are emerging, such as this one. And they’re right; as often happens, the military fights the last war. We’re built for vast nuclear battles in the US with technologically sophisticated but expensive systems. Iran is countering us with different tactics and inexpensive weapons.
In a sense, what we’re seeing in this war echoes wars for the US back to the American revolution. The British were fighting an old war. The colonist changed tactics and won.
Changing policies and weapons in the US will be a challenge. As President Eisenhower warned, the military-industrial complex has a firm hand on procurement. Defense companies manage Congress through projects, manufacturing, and employment. We build systems as much for our economy as much as we do for our security. Meanwhile, the public nods agreeably because, ‘patriotism’.
Trump is responding by increasing the defense budget and calling for more expensive weapons systems. He’s pushing hard on a new class of Trump battleships. As with many things Trump, the battleships he envisions are outdated and bloated relics better fit for the past.
As the war stays stall, oil prices are slowly rising. A Gasbuddy AI analysis from March of 2026 is hilarious to read:
“GasBuddy’s latest projection paints a starkly different picture from the past. The company now forecasts the 2026 U.S. gasoline price average to fall to $2.97 per gallon, marking the fourth consecutive annual decline and the lowest average since 2020. This sets up a clear seasonal pattern, with prices expected to peak in May around $3.12 per gallon before declining steadily to a low in December of $2.83 per gallon.”
Mock Paper Scissors found a saner prediction from a Gasbuddy expert:
“GasBuddy’s Patrick De Haan, a widely cited gas price expert, predicts the national average price at the pump will hit $4.50 a gallon within a week (currently $4.30).”
Never to shirk from taking advantage of a bad situation, British Petroleum is making some handsome profits from the war and the world energy situation.
“Gas prices have risen 49% since the beginning of 2026, according to prices tracked by AAA. They dropped by an average of 7 cents a gallon after a two-week ceasefire was announced last week.”
And as any driver now knows, that drop is already gone.
The Neurons observed my thoughts on fronts and responded. They put Elton John and “All Quiet on the Western Front” from 1979 in my morning mental music stream. Lifted from a movie of the same name, it’s not a song that comes on the radio much. The song’s tempo’s and musical style reminds me of “Someone Saved My Life Tonight” from 1975.
I hope your front is calm and peaceful and that you progress to better and better places for you in all ways possible.
Strong sunshine spreads across the valley from the east this morning. There are few clouds. The temperature is 41, the forecast calls for sunny weather, and the high end will see 67 F.
The latest move in Operation Epic LOOK — SQUIRREL! came out today.
How badly Trump’s war in Iran is going, which he declared over as soon as it began (among other things)
The 1973 War Powers Act and the 60-day limit
Upcoming 2026 midterm elections and a potential blue wave
The Strait of Hormuz and whether it’s blockaded, who is doing it, and whether ships are paying tolls, and who’s collecting it
Trump’s feud with Pope Leo XIV
Rising disapproval numbers and bad polls
The backlash to depicting himself as Jesus via AI
Labor market weakness
Exploding national debt
Low consumer confidence
Trump’s health, stumbling, and slurring
The Epstein files, and Trump’s role in Epstein’s life and crimes.
If it’s not one thing, it’s the same damn thing, over and over.
Trump did his Bible verse reading. The right-wingers predictably gushed over Trump’s bold leadership. Many of the rest of us said, “Wow, that was terrible.”
Jokes arose about whether Trump would read from the Quentin Tarentino version. While others’ Bible reading was live-streamed, Trump’s was recorded and heavily edited.
Your Trump quote for the day:
Ah, Trump math. “Nobody’s ever seen anything like it.”
Sure, we have. Many con artists make outlandish claims like this, such as George C. Parker, famous for selling people ownership in the Brooklyn Bridge.
Today’s music comes from my dream side. During the dream, I kept hearing the song, “Shame on the Moon” by Bob Seger.
But the dream was about this big birthday celebration for somebody. At its end, Shirley Bassey was introduced to sing.
As I remembered the dream, The Neurons introduced a different Shirley Bassey song, “History Repeating”. The one with her and the Propellerheads from 1997 took over the morning mental music stream.
Lyrics
The word is about, there’s something evolving Whatever may come, the world keeps revolving They say the next big thing is here That the revolution’s near But to me it seems quite clear That it’s all just a little bit of history repeating
The newspapers shout – a new style is growing But it don’t know if it’s coming or going There is fashion – there is fad Some is good – some is bad And the joke is rather sad That it’s all just a little bit of history repeating
We heard from Mom. The social worker contacted her. Mom sent a chaotic text summarizing it. Basically, the social worker said that they would not be helping Mom move from the assisted living facility. Mom ended the text by asking my sister if she’ll help her move out at the end of the month.
Sunshine baths the east. Dark, stormy clouds claim the rest of the horizon. It’s 58 F outside with a mild, pleasantly balmy wind. 62 is expected to be the high as rain returns to the valley.
We’re going into eight weeks in the Trump Iran war. Trump and Iran each are declaring victory. As it was a month ago, the Strait of Hormuz remains closed. The ceasefire that Trump declared is fracturing as Iranian ships fire on tanks and US ships fire on Iranian ships and seize them.
Trump’s comments are the war seem almost meaningless. He doesn’t seem to understand what’s going on sometimes, making contradictory claims. He’s proving himself to be as poor at managing a war or negotiating a ceasefire as he was running his businesses. The difference here: he can’t save himself in a bankruptcy court. There are no contractors he can stiff and walk away from. The art of the con has been fully exposed.
Stock markets don’t know to go up or down. Oil prices immediately rose.
So, we sit on Monday morning, waiting to see what will happen on Monday afternoon.
Meanwhile, the Epstein files are still out there, waiting for all to be revealed.
My wife and I watched Shrinking last night. Today’s song was featured. My wife sang along with it; when the show was over, she walked around the house singing it. Somehow The Neurons ended up mindlessly playing it over and over in the morning mental music stream.
From out of 2011, here is Christina Perri with “A Thousand Years”.
The lyrics cycling through my brain:
I have died every day waiting for you Darling, don’t be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years I’ll love you for a thousand more
Time stands still Beauty in all she is I will be brave I will not let anything take away What’s standing in front of me Every breath, every hour has come to this
The song was originally written and featured on “Twilight”, which I’ve never seen. I found an interesting ‘cover’ of the song and thought I’d share it here.
My wish for you is that you find yourself on Tuesday healthy, happy, safe, and free.
It’s an amusing but irritating thing. Whenever I type Sunday into WP, it automatically suggests December should follow.
It’s a comfortable, green spring day. Clouds and sunshine are mixing it up. It lightly rained earlier. We’re sitting at 59 F and expect to reach 72.
Mom is still at the assisted living facility. Says she’ll stay there until May 1. Plans after that? She has none. She meets with a social worker and therapists this week. They’ll give their assessments. Mom says the social worker told her that she’ll provide Mom with a ride to Mom’s house. The social worker says she hasn’t spoken to Mom.
Mom’s yard needs mowed. She wonders why her son-in-law won’t do it. This is the same SIL who she accused of doing things to her. The same one she says is hateful and mean. The one who moved her into his house and rearranged rooms to make space for her.
My wife’s elderly aunt passed away, 86. That was the last of her mother’s brothers and sisters. She was a sweetie, religious, a bit conservative, but tolerant and friendly. RIP, Betty.
I think it was on Meidas Touch where I read of the Strait of Schrödinger: the Strait of Hormuz is open and they’re not. Iran boats fired on tankers, another testament to Trump’s marvelous negotiating and planning skills.
How is it Trump’s fault? The strait was open until he attacked Iran. He destabilized the government. Although a hardliner is in power, the factions are stronger now. They’ve seen that blocking the strait is a money-making proposition. A toll must be paid to get through. Thanks, Dozy Donny.
Ever a cliche, Trump warned Iran, “No more mister nice guy.” Apparently, he thinks that dropping bombs, killing a few thousand people and threatening to wipe them out is being ‘mister nice guy’.
I read up about TrumpRx this morning. If you recall, Trump touted this as a historical achievement which will significantly impact drug prices.
About 24,000 drugs are available for sale in the US. TrumpRx has less than 100 on it.
A survey of adults showed that two thirds said they’d heard nothing or little about TrumpRx.
This is much like Trump’s other promises, big on hyperbole, short on execution, tiny on impact. Examples of that is his wall with Mexico. Now in Trump’s second year of his second term, 25 miles have been added. But they have big plans…
Trump has canceled Operation LOOK – SQUIRREL! He’s replacing with Operation EPIC LOOK – SQUIRREL! This is because Trump and his planners like using ‘epic’ in their project names. Operation EPIC LOOK – SQUIRREL! has two objectives: stop people from talking about Trump’s role in Epstein’s life and crimes, and to improve Trump’s approval ratings.
I have Bruce Springsteen singing “Hungry Heart” in my morning mental music stream. I have no idea why The Neurons are playing it. Far as I could tell, the 1980 song is a jaunty tune about a man abandoning his wife and children. But that’s The Neurons for you: they play by their own rules.
I’m off to Operation Epic Yard Waste Cleanup. Loaded it all up last night. Now it’s time to drive to the disposal center, get in line, and drop it off.
Hope you all have a great day, full of peace, love, and good food.
It’s up to 44 from its overnight low of 32 F. Clouds and fog were graying the blue sky but now they’re gone. Unbridled sunshine lights up the green spring world. We’re heading for the upper sixties, they say.
Mom’s deadline is today. 30 days ago, she told the assisted living facility she was moving out. She then started searching for someone to ‘take her home’. It’s been a tug of war since. Today is quiet; no texts from Mom or sisters. I wait on pins and needles.
There’s breaking news — again.
Crude oil prices fell to $90 a barrel based on something Iran was said to agree to. The stock markets were quick to shout good news and go up, but then, that is its modern nature.
We won’t know what it means for a while. Higher oil prices are already embedded in our economic fabric. It will take a while to get it out.
Will the war be over? Will the US military forces leave that area? Depends on what Trump’s bones say.
Even if this war ends, what will happen next? What nation will Trump next attack?
Waiting to see when SOUTHCOM kills some more people in boats in the Pacific.
Still waiting to see what else is in the Epstein files.
Still waiting to see what’s really going on with Trump’s health and mind.
That brings me to “Wild Wild Life”, a 1986 song by Talking Heads.
I’d read a piece about Kavanagh saying, oh, based on Dobbs and original intent, the military draft could be illegal, because it’s not mentioned in the Constitution. That encourage me to scowl and mutter about cherry picking precedence and the dead hand of our founders — all white men — orchestrating our response to modern issues via conservatives who want to turn back the clock.
That all triggered Der Neurons to bring “Wild Wild Life” lyrics into the morning mental music stream.
Like sitting on pins and needles Things fall apart It’s scientific
Sleeping on the Interstate, oh-oh-oh Getting wild, wild life Checking in and checking out, oh-oh-oh I got ’em, wild, wild life Spending all of my money and time, oh-oh-oh On too much wild, wild life We wanna go and we go where we go, oh-oh-oh Ah, doing wild, wild life
I know it, that’s how we start, oh-oh-oh Got some wild, wild life
h/t to musixmatch.com
Hope your wild, wild, Friday is a safe, prosperous, peaceful one for you, maybe with a little celebration and libation. Have the best one you can make.
A gray dawn in Ashland. Rain is expected throughout the day as clouds gather and temperatures drift from the low forties to the low fifties. Temperatures are expected to drop into the low thirties tomorrow morning. A frost warning is in effect.
Reason.com reminded us of Trump and the emptiness of his declarations and claims. This one was about the national debt. Ten years ago, Trump said he would eliminate the national debt. Oh, the cheers he got for that.
They asked him, how long would it take? “Fairly quickly,” Trump replied. When pressed for a more specific answer, Trump provided a shocking timeline. “Well, I would say over a period of eight years.”
Analysis showed that Trump was blowing wind. His plans to eliminate the national debt was diametrically opposed to his plans to lower taxes. Lower taxes won.
The national debt was 19 trillion dollars ten years ago. It’s now 39 trillion dollars. President Biden added to it, but Trump has done most of the damage.
Put this in their with the other claims he’s made. That’s he’s the peace president. A unifier. That he was going to replace Obamacare with a much better plan. That Mexico would pay for the wall. That he would lower prices from day one. That he would drain the swamp, eliminate fraud, waste, and abuse.
That he would release the Epstein files on day one.
Sickening how much he has lied and done to destroy the nation. More sickeningly, so many Republicans still cheer him on.
It was the fourth attack in four days. No war; no court; no evidence. No judge, jury, ruling. Just Trump ordering the US military to kill untried civilians.
Today’s song comes from 1986. The Neurons had nothing to do with it. I read the news and remembered “Bullet the Blue Sky” by U2. Inspired by what Bono witnessed the US military doing in El Salvador and Nicaragua under Reagan. Much like now, when Trump is using military force in the name of Christianity, morality, democracy, and freedom to kill others. Sadly, this is an American tradition. Trump is just being overt, boastful, and brazen about it.
It’s demoralizing and depressing, but angers me as well, watching Trump tear down our norms and violate the laws, throw his name on everything, build monuments to himself. Meanwhile, measles outbreaks are on the rise, food and gas prices are climbing, and Trump is killing and destroying in our name. Our national debt grows but worse is what he’s done to our reputation and morals.
I hope your Wednesday is filled with peace and grace, and that we can garner the voice and political will to move us toward a better future, like the future we were once moving toward.
After bluffing and bullshitting and actively weaving chaos and doubt, Trump’s act has worn thin.
Evidence that the United States is no longer respected and feared is showing up everywhere. Most pointedly, we see it as Iran refuses to give in while our nation’s traditional allies turn down Trump’s requests for help. Instead, they’re forming new alliances and agreements, leaving the US in the cold.
MAGA has responded to Trump’s losses and failures with predictable childishness, “Your rules.” Obstinate to a fault, they just do not learn. As the world moves on from its dalliance with right-wing theater, they’re going to be left behind. Which, if you recall, is why some of them turned to Trump in the first place. They will continue to pursue their FAFO course.
The International Monetary Fund issued warnings that the United States under Trump could drag down the global economy. It’s the war. Mostly. Trump’s Iran War is supercharging the oil and gas prices and disrupting supply lines. That means modestly less growth, but as the war continues, the chances for a global recession increase.
Symptomatic of Trump’s wide-ranging, negative impact are World Cup tourism forecasts. This should have been a boon for the United States and the eleven US cities hosting World Cup events but — Trump.
The United States is already coping with reduced tourism. Rising prices, triggered by Trump’s Iran War, broken trade agreements, and Trump’s tariffs are one big reason. However, experts are pointing to Trump’s hostile immigration policies. Even when people are authorized to enter the United States, they’re sometimes being turned back. Some of the reasons cited is that they criticized Trump. Not taking chances, people are talking with their cash and staying away from the United States.
