Category: fiction

Friday’s Theme Music

Dark day in the house despite the sun’s arrival at its appointed time of 7:40 AM. He’d been a little slow warming up for his shift. Most people didn’t know that inside the sun were maintainers on shifts ensuring the light and heat was properly maintained. The sun preferred that no one ever found out. They might start looking if the heat and shine start sputtering. Of course, there was one being called, “Sun”. Parry had never met him; his predecessor, a woman hired him. Maybe ‘the sun’ was another myth. Who knows the truth? The truth was, he was still a little hammered. Had gone out with a few from other shifts yesterday. Made a night of it, ha, ha. That was their favorite joke.

He’d had reason for going out and drinking. This was his anniversary. January 7, 2022. (Right? Wasn’t it? They’d argued the date for some time the previous night.) Been on the job for four hundred years. Enough for a pay bump. Six hundred more until retirement. He’d already begun planning that. Had picked out a star and was saving for a place. Was tired of living in the solar system. He’d spent his whole life there. Born on Pluto, then moved to Mercury. Followed Mum into solar management. Got a job locally. But, he would travel, go to other stars, after he retired. Maybe marry. If he met the right one. Only place he’d really been besides Pluto, Mercury, and the Sun, was the dark side of the moon. Was everything they’d said it would be. Yes, he had been on a few comets. But come on, who had not?

The sun was on course. Would set over Ashland at 4:55 PM. His shift ended a little later. He poured a cup of coffee and peeked into the little region of his responsibility. Chilly day down there. 43. Cloudy. Rainy. Would only reach 45. Not really bad for a winter day, as he understood all that, which was, not much. Weather was another’s purview. He was all about the shine.

With everything settled down, he turned on some music, shifting through dials until a tune he liked was struck, and began playing computer solitaire and wishing for new games. Like the sun couldn’t afford it.

###

That just popped up, so I went with it. That out of the way, today’s theme music is by Jet, a 2003 song called “Are You Gonna Be My Girl”. Of course, I was singing it to a cat last night. A ginger boy. So, it was, are you gonna be my cat? He stared at me, like, what? The song stayed in the morning mental music stream. So, here we are.

Stay positive. Test negative. Wear a mask as needed. Get the jabs when you can. Coffee time for me. Cheers

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Lingua Floofa

Lingua Floofa (floofinition) – Various animal languages and terms cobbled together to establish a common tongue among species and breeds of diverse speech.

In use: “Lingua floofa is commonly employed among pets such as dogs, cats, and hamsters, but movement in the twenty-first century also has farm animals using the language, and animals like deer as they live in closer proximity to humans in cities.”

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Floofsume

Floofsume (floofinition) – 1. To include or place an animal within something larger or more comprehensive.

In use: “Cats, dogs, birds, goats, pets in general, and domestic animals, are often floofsumed as floofs.”

2. Human or humans using large amounts of resources on animals, especially pets.

In use: “People with a sick pet often find their days floofsumed by helping their fur friend recover.

3. Getting preoccupied with animals or animal-related events, action, or information.

In use: “Many folks find their time floofsumed by watching amazing animal videos on the web.”

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Subfloofminal

Subfloofminal (floofinition) – 1. An animal who makes little impressions on others.

In use: “Dixie was such a loving dog with her people but was shy and withdrawn to the point of being subfloofminal. Many visitors claimed they didn’t know a dog live there, for Dixie always spirited herself into hiding when company arrived.”

2. Doing something for an animal without the need of conscious thought.

In use: “Petting Herc was subfloofminal; the big dog would steal onto a nearby space where Donovan’s hand could find Herc’s head, and that’s what Donovan always did, as if the pooch commanded him telefloofically.”

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Clusterfloof

Clusterfloof (floofinition) – A situation involving animals that is disastrously mishandled or problems verging on disaster that involve animals.

In use: “For many people with pets, putting up a Christmas tree rapidly escalates into a clusterfloof.”

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Floofmongous

Floofmongous (floofinition) – A huge animal, or animal especially large for its breed or species.

In use: “The floofmongous Derry, a German Shepherd, bounded into the room with one bark that deafened all, and a happy, toothy grin on his face.”

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Floofmeld

Floofmeld (floofinition) – State where a human and one or more animals, or several animals, are in agreement with what’s to be done.

In use: “With a dim day outside highlighted by battering winds, chilly temperatures, and intermittent rain, she and the floofs had a floofmeld, heading to the sofa with a blanket, snacks, and a book, to laze away the day in warmth and comfort. Before two many pages were turned, all three were curled up in sleep.”

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Floofnipulate

Floofnipulate (floofinition) – To alter or change behavior or intentions by an animal’s actions.

In use: “As he went into the kitchen for a cup of coffee, his cat tried to floofnipulate him into petting him by darting into his path and issuing little grunts, forcing him to take a zigzag course.”

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Floofcial

Floofcial (floofinition) – 1. Involving or relating to animal activities in which people spend time talking to animals, doing enjoyable things with animals, or sponsoring events which benefit animals.

In use: “A cat floofcial was happening in the backyard, with the three resident cats in their customary places being visited by three neighbor cats sitting on the fences, stopping by to say hello and chew the kibble, so to speak.”

2. Experience of an animal cleaning a human face with its tongue.

“Whenever she got home, her dog had to conduct a thorough floofcial, as if he was cleansing her of the outside world.”

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