Subfloofmate(floofinition) A change of animal behavior to deal with an unacceptable situation or decision. Origins: 1559, Middle Floofish from Floofieval Flooftin, subflooftamus.
In Use: “Ollie wanted treats, to which Ali said, “No, you’ve already had our treats and can’t have more because you’re getting fat,” which caused Ollie to subfloofmate his frustrations by going into the bedroom and knocking everything off the dresser.”
In Use: “Part of the success of suavexavier’s posts about his dobies is how they subfloofmate to deal with the situations he presents them, especially when it’s Bear.”
Floofternal(floofinition) – Relating to, of, belonging to, or characteristic of a person who understands and cares for animals. Origins: 15th Century Floofeval Floofish
In Use: “People’s lives get tangled with floofternal complexities when they decide to share their homes and lives with an animal.”
In Use: “Mycheala had a strong floofternal instinct and was often roped into saving animals, a duty she richly enjoyed and embraced.”
Summer is pushing more blue sky and sunshine on us. Chastised clouds have slipped the area and the sun reigns supreme. 70 F at 11 AM, we’re anticipating…78 F as our high. Sweet to me.
Papi the butter butt floof loves this warm weather. He came in this morning. We shared a purrful visit, then he stuffed himself on kibble, wet food, treats, and water. Now he’s floofsconced in the vinca. Only his sweet ginger and white face is visible among the green leaves.
Today’s music arrived with a boost from my wife. I was listening to a video which played a few seconds of every Billboard weekly number one hit song in the United States from the beginning of 1960 to the end of 1969. This came to my attention via 1440’s deep dive into the history of rock and roll.
My wife came in as the video advanced through “These Boots Are Made for Walking”, “The Ballad of the Green Berets”, “(You’re My) Soul and Inspiration”, “Good Lovin'”, and “Monday, Monday”.
“What year are you listening to?” she asked.
“Guess,” I replied.
She tried 1970, 1968, and then 1965. “1966,” I said. A little later, Bobbie Gentry sang, “Harper Valley PTA”.
My wife sang along and then said, “I love that song. But the very first record I ever wanted was “Society’s Child” by Janis Ian. I think I was thirteen. I asked for it for Christmas but I didn’t get it.”
I looked it up. “That came out in 1967.”
“How old was I then?”
“Ten.”
Anyway, The Neurons slipped “Society’s Child” into the morning mental music stream when I wasn’t paying attention. My wife thought the song had hit number one; I never told her that it didn’t break the top 10. Of course, bigotry and racism and it’s controversial topic of interracial dating kept it from getting airtime.
I’m at the coffee shop, my fix at hand. There was a line and a hold up. As I waited, the manager came around with my drink, along with the side of ice water which I always request. “Where do you want these, Michael?” she asked.
Laughing, I answered, “I can take them,” but she insisted on delivering them to my table for me.
Floofsconce (floofinition) – Term to describe animal sleeping in a safe, protected, and comfortable space. Origins: 1594, western regions of Floofrope.
In Use: “People who share life with floofs are always pleased when their floof can floofsconce somewhere where the people can reliably find them safe and comfortable.
In Use: “For feline floofs, under and behinds bushes outdoors in the summer is where they often floofsconce.”
In Use: “As a puppy, Animal usually dropped and slept wherever he stopped playing, but as an adult, he always floofsconced in Matty’s room, on their bed.”
Memfloofesis (floofinition) Term which describes the impression that an animal reminds others of another animal. Origins: first described in “The Floofilogues of Floofto”, circa 400 BC.
In Use: “When Pandora joined the household, memfloofesis arose among the other housefloofs that the new black floof was uncannily like their old black mate, Sugar, starting with how silent Pandora was to how they ate and slept on their back with their legs in the air. The memfloofesis was such that they were sure Sugar had come back to them, which made all very happy.”
Noctrol(floofinition) – Floofterally, ‘nocturnal patrol’, a phrase employed by animals in reference to activities done between sunset and sunrise. Origins: 1600s, early middle Floofish.
In Use: “Spunk entered the house after her humans finally answered her summons and opened the door. Excited by all she’d seen on her notrol, she chatted to them, but all they did was tell her how sweet she was and feed her.”
In Use: “During his noctrol, Austin Powers witnessed Mark leave bed and quietly go to the kitchen, open the refrigerator and get out leftover pizza. Knowing Mark was on a diet, Austin Powers quietly joined him, demonstrating again that floofgilance pays off.”
Ponflooficate(floofinition) An animal’s manner of expressing themselves in a pompous or floofmatic style. Origins: 15th Century, first noted in The Flooferbury Tails, a collection of stories written in Middle Flooflish by Rex.
In Use: “Henry the Bassett Hound always walked into the room’s middle and ponflooficated in loud baying until he was floofcated with treats and attention.”
In Use: “Sadie could teach a master class in ponflooficating, the way she sat down and miaowed about the world.”
Proflooftiate(floofinition) – To gain or regain an animal’s favor or goodwill. Origins: Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard’s Almanack, 1752.
In Use: “There was a reason for Spitfire’s name. Once she was upset, Shirley could only proflooftiate using Spitfire’s favorite treats until Spitfire relented.”
Michael Seidel, writer 