Floofsumptive
Floofsumptive (floofinition) – 1. Descriptor for an animal’s approach who assumes they are the apex resident in a household. First noted use circa 1970, New York, USA.
In Use: “Closed doors impinged Queen Champ’s floofsumptive foundation that something must be happening on the other side. This was her empire and announced her displeasure with loud caterwauling and scratching.”
2. An animal which takes for granted that they are authorized to go anywhere, do anything, and eat everything. Origins: 1740 colonial America.
In Use: “As soon as food was set down, Sheldon made a presumptive claim with his chompers, no matter the food group.”
3. A belief that animal’s movements, activities, or behavior is expected and predictable. Origins: AOL, late 1990s.
In Use: “Following a floofsumptive bias, Kelly expected Hannibal to trot out and greet her, but the little pup was nowhere in sight, inducing floofxiety in her that something had happened to him.”
Monday’s Theme Music
Mood:
Thwump thwump thwump…the helicopter goes on, up above the mountain high, hovering and waiting, waiting and hovering, picking up its load, going away again, dumping the load, coming back again.
Gotta be boring up there. Least the pilot should have a nice view, up above the trees so high, like a moon in the sky.
It’s a clear Monday, with blue running infinitely on and back again. Sunshine drenches the scene. 69 F now after an overnight low of 40 F, the thermometer is scaling the degrees. Probably stop at 76 F, they tell me. It’s April 22, 2024, for those keeping score at home.
The cats are as happy as floofs lazing in sunshine. An ear sometimes stirs. Another moment witnesses an eye cracking open a hair width. Other than those infrequent movements, they seem set for the next few hours.
Back in Pittsburgh, a new report has Mom feeling unwell again. Tests are being run. She’d been doing well and was scheduled to return home tomorrow. We’ll monitor all for the outcome. Little sister, aka grandma G, provides me with updates. She and her hubby had been sick herself recently. But they’re better know. Just seemed like a mild flu. I think we live in an era of health uncertainty. Sure the pandemic plays a role. I notice that many people around Ashlandia grow angry but resigned when they get sick. Wonder if that’s must my bias, or does this happen elsewhere?
Musically, The Neurons have “For All the Cows” ringing in my morning mental music stream (Trademark backtracking). Utilizing that song’s melody, I’d been singing about coffee. Actually, it was about my coffee cup. Like, I need a cup, a coffee cup, I’ll fill it up, if I had a coffee cup. I’d been wandering with the cup. It mindlessly departed my hand as I slipped through rooms and tasks. Found it in the third place I looked, my bathroom. Yes, I drink coffee in the bathroom while I’m shaving and dressing, okay. Although I didn’t shave today. Didn’t feel the need for a blade on my skin.
“For All the Cows” is a Dave Grohl/Foo Fighters production. Came out in 1995. It’s soft quasi-jazz opening and strange words are beguiling. I listen to it and search for some kind of meaning for what he’s singing about. I’ve always tentatively concluded it delivers an analogy comparing people to cows but also addressed success and the changes success brings to the herd, how you change herds with success. I don’t know. My understanding shifts, depending on my moo-ed. Heh.
Stay positive, strong, optimistic (that the same as positive?), and lean forward. Please Vote Blue. Now, more coffee and cow music. Cheers
Michael Seidel, writer 