Lumberfloof (floofinition) – 1. Animal who moves in a clumsy, awkward way.
In use: “As kittens, the polydactyl orange tabbies were lumberfloof, tripping over their paw and belly-flopping when attempting jumps, but they soon were agile little speedsters, jumping with Olympian grace and skill.”
2. Animal who climbs trees.
In use: “Many animals are natural lumbefloofs, but Jack the Beagle proved to be one, too, surprising everyone — especially the squirrels.”
Friday’s sunrise at 7:15 AM was like riding in a Yugo: a limp journey. The Yugo sun seemed gray on this Friday of October 10, 2021, gray as his thoughts. Alexa informed him that the area humidity was ninety-one percent but that no rain was expected. Cloudy gloominess was just the valley’s mood. It suited him. He was gloomy because the cats had indulged in intense floofgames. The games had disrupted his sleep. He didn’t feel rested. Maybe the sky was like that — unrested and tired.
Sunset is expected at 6:41 PM. With a temperature perking up from 39 to 48 on his way to a weak 60 degrees F, he wasn’t expecting much of the day. Maybe coffee would help. Couldn’t hurt.
An old Paul Simon song occupied his morning mental music stream. Using ‘old’ amused him. What is old to one because it’s very familiar is fresh and new to another. That’s how ‘old’ music kept acquiring new fans.
This song was called “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover”. Came out in 1975. Yeah, he remembered that. First year in the military. Year his spouse graduated high school. She’d been in his dreams. So had the cats. They were a confused miasma. Also involved looking for clothes. Recurring tropes.
As he thought about the dreams, clumping about in a sullen manner, the cats sang for their food. Simon’s song morphed into “50 Ways to Feed Your Kitty”. Just open a can, Sam. Give ’em a treat, um…Meat. Pour out kibble, Sybil. Just give ’em some food.
Stay positive, he told himself, mentally snorting with mental derision. Test negative — yeah, fingers crossed, always. Wear a mask. Uh-huh. And get the vax. Well, he’d done that. Waiting on word for the booster.
The coffee had arrived. He sat back to listen to the music and stare at the cloud. Where is the sun, he wondered. Where is the sun?