Denise Said
UFO – Unidentified Floof Object
UFO – Unidentified Floof Object (floofinition) – Material belonging to or on an animal that isn’t recognizable and must be treated with caution until categorized.
In use: “Something was on the hall floor. Look like a clump. Could be bark carried in by one of the cats. Or it could be a UFO. Warily she approached. It needed to be picked up, but she wasn’t going to risk that with her bare hands. No sir, when it came to UFOs, it was better to use toilet paper or paper towel, in case it’s a floofberry.”
Floofzard
Floofzard (floofinition) – 1. An inherent danger associated with living with animals.
In use: “Big floofzards for people with housepets is stepping in unfortunate materials without warning in the middle of the night, materials which are often wet and stinky, either from being regurgitated, or from a bowel movement, forcing the human victim to do the floofhop until reaching somewhere to wash their foot.”
2. An animal with magical powers as depicted in floofy tales.
In use: “Many people think floofzards are fantasy but animals know floofzards exist and respect them for what they can do. For example, floofzards are often able to compel people to feed them treats and special foods with merely a glance.”
Thursday’s Theme Music
Today is Thursday, February 25, 2021. Sunrise was at 6:53 AM and sunset comes at 5:56 PM. Sunset will soon be after 6 PM here in Ashland, 2021, which makes me happy. Of course, we’re barreling toward daylight savings time, that terrific day when we spring ahead one hour, losing one hour of sleep and one hour of late afternoon/evening sun. Yes, eventually, it catches up again, but I’d rather not endure it each year.
I was a child, emerging into my teenage years during the 1960s. That meant that the Beatles were the group I heard most. Beatles, Beach Boys, Rolling Stones…you know the list. The press was always atwitter over what any musical band was doing. That’s what pop culture is all about, innit? Movie stars had been dominating until then but the landscape was shifting.
Anyway, a song by the Beatles, “Hey Jude”, has captured the mental musical stream this morning, beginning to end. It’s one of those things — yeah, an earworm — where I believe that I must share it in order to save myself. Sorry.
This is a repeat. The song was selected as the day’s theme music back in 2016. At that time, I heard it on the store’s PA system. You know, stores like piping music in to create the right environment, set the shopping pace, distract shoppers, etc. On that day, “Hey Jude” was playing as I shopped. Most shoppers encountered were lipping the words or singing it to themselves. Imagination ran with it, creating a Broadway musical where we all come together in the aisles, singing and dancing. It would be an episode of “Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist these days.
Stay positive, test negative, wear a mask, and get vaccinated. Also, listen to this 1968 song. Cheers
Michael Seidel, writer 